Kristabella: Full of Snark Since 1977

Posted By Kristabella on June 27, 2011

Yes, I know. I know. I didn’t post on Sunday, so I officially fail at my renewed blogging attempt. But, I posted on a Friday AND a Saturday, so I figure it makes up for it. And I’m not giving up! I’m still going to make it a majority of the 21 days.

I have no excuse for not taking the time to post something Sunday. Well, besides my laziness and amazing sloth-like tendencies.

See, after Saturday night’s wine fest, I was not feeling up to much on Sunday. I slept until 11 and moved from the bed to the couch and then watched 6 straight episodes of Mad Men. (I would have watched more, but that was all I had from Netflix.)

I had big plans for this weekend. BIG! HUGE! It was the first weekend since getting back from Jamaica where I had nothing to do. I didn’t have to drive anywhere, or visit family. I had no obligations. It was glorious! I was going to clean! And go grocery shopping! And do laundry and get organized!

I did none of this. I drank wine, went to my WW meeting and that was it. I didn’t even make it to the store, with my paltry list of like 10 things. I made it, though, to Taco Bell for dinner. And then I even walked to 7-11 to get some chocolate milk. But getting in the car to do the grocery shopping? Too much effort. My laziness knows no bounds.

And then I went to bed at 7:30. No, really. I got like 11 hours of sleep last night.

I’m pretty sure that additional sleep was to blame for the fact that I have this giant bump and scrape on my right shin:

In a move of pure insanity, I decided that I would run for the train this morning. I heard it arriving as I was paying my fare and decided I could totally make it if I ran.

(Not only is this a thought I should never have, it’s also a thought I should never have at 7:30 AM before I’ve had any coffee.)

In a stroke of what I assumed was pure genius, I decided I should run up the escalator, as opposed to the stairs, since that would get me up to the platform faster. This was a stupid idea mostly because I take the stairs every day. My body is aware of the height of each of the steps. The steps on the escalator are bigger.

So in a lazy, sleepy haze, I was running up stairs on an escalator and the end of my flip flop caught on the step I didn’t quite make and DOWN GOES JOHNSON!

I ignored the pain and hoped I didn’t rip a hole in my pants, and continued running up the stairs to the train. I made it just as the doors were closing. I made a little wave to the driver, to please let me on, to no avail.

All that, and I DIDN’T EVEN MAKE THE TRAIN.

The stupidest thing about this? The trains come frequently in the AM rush. It’s not like I was going to have to wait 20 minutes for the next one. THERE IS NO REASON TO RUN! Plus, escalator stairs = way more hurty than other cement stairs!

And it chipped my brand! New! Pedicure! That I got Saturday!

This will teach me to try and be active before 8 AM sans caffeine.

Category: A Dash of the Crazy, A Day in the Life of Me, Medical Mishaps | 9 Comments »
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Posted By Kristabella on June 25, 2011

I would like to tell you how dedicated I am, that I’m posting on a Saturday night. Because I’ve had a many glass of red wine. So much so, I have the “red wine mouth”.

This is why I don’t have a boyfriend, isn’t it? It’s OK, you don’t have to lie to me. I can see it.

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So I was going to post earlier today about the Casey Anthony trial. Because I have OPINIONS. And I figure, what better day than Saturday night to post these opinions? Because no one cares what U think. But it would be a post. And seriously, I’m this close to being part of the daily trial chat becausee I WANT TO TALK ABOUT THIS WITH SOMEONE!

In fact, when the whole shit went down with Casey’s mom Cindy on Thurdsay, I had to tell people at work. And then this girl was all “wehere did you see this?” And I said “Twitter” SHE SCOFFED! Did you know that people don’t believe that Twitter knows all? I had to assure her that it was a live feeed from the courthouse, not some weird person in Alsaska tweeting about it. Twitter is awesome.

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I shouldn’t have a webcam.

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I always think drunk posting would be a good idea, but I feel like I have nothing to say besidnes what I’ve already texted to my frineds:

• Hi, I miss you
• I miss you lost
• I’m drunk’
• Yqy

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This is why I was meant to be a drunk in the 19th centruyt……..I’m better without tecnologyu.

Category: All Things Blogging | 10 Comments »
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Posted By Kristabella on June 24, 2011

Look at me, people. It’s Day 2 and I’m keeping it up! It’s Friday night and I’m writing a post! Woo hoo!

So back a few weeks ago, when I wasn’t blogging, I was asked to write a review of A Discovery of Witches by Deb Harkness for the BlogHer Book Club. And I’m here to tell you READ THIS BOOK NOW!

Go here and read my review.

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In other news, while I haven’t been blogging here, I have been posting weekly over at Food Lush. (Well weekly when I remember that the day after Memorial Day is Tuesday and not Monday.)

This week I ask for your recommendations for homemade salad dressings! Help a sista out, will ya?

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And that’s all you’re getting on a Friday night…but yay me for keeping to my word! For two days, at least!

Have a great weekend!

Category: All Things Blogging, Reviews | 1 Comment »
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Posted By Kristabella on June 23, 2011

Hey! What’s up, internet? How’s it hangin’? What’s new with you?

*twiddles thumbs*

So that was a long, unexpected break. In fact, that’s the longest I’ve gone without blogging since I was kind of forced to stop blogging back when I got in trouble at work for blogging and kind of got fired because of it. Good times!

It wasn’t planned. I just don’t know what happened. I mean, I even have two fully written posts in my inbox, just waiting to be copied and pasted into WordPress. And I just…*shrugs* meh. It’s too much work to turn on the computer once I get home. And then, once you get out of the habit, it’s much easier to sit lazily on your couch and watch TV than spend even more time on the computer. Especially since I can do most of the same computer things on my phone, while still lying lazily on my couch.

So yeah, nothing exciting has been going on in my life. I’m not dating anyone, I didn’t get married and run away to Cambodia and I’m not having a baby. My house is still dirty. I’m roommate-free (have been since the end of April). I started watching Mad Men, which may explain the lack of posting. I’d rather come home and devour those Netflix DVDs then do much else. If you don’t believe me, ask the pile of dishes in the sink or the mound of laundry overflowing from the hamper or the cat hair that is so thick it’s hiding my rug.

I was at a family party on Saturday and I was getting harassed for not writing. Because people want to know what is going on in my life so they can live vicariously through me. And I was all “my life is boring. The most exciting thing is that I somehow shaved part of my back this morning while trying to shave my armpit. See?” And then I proceeded to show them my cut on my back/not-my-armpit.

So, really, truly, you are NOT missing anything. Not one thing at all. Trust.

But, I would like to get back in the habit. And I know it takes 21 days to make a habit. So I’m going to start forcing myself to write, every day, for the next 21 days straight. Well, at least post. I mean, I do have those pre-written posts ready to go.

That’s your warning! Be prepared for 21 days of crap until I get my groove back. Or 21 days of cat pictures.

So readers, what have YOU been up to?

 

Category: A Dash of the Crazy, A Day in the Life of Me, All Things Blogging, Land of Random, Writing | 16 Comments »
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Posted By Kristabella on May 17, 2011

I’m back from Jamaica, mon. And I know I should have written about this trip sooner, but man, I am still exhausted from all that relaxing. I did more at work by 10 AM on Monday than I had done in five days in Jamaica. Seriously. Just getting up and showering and commuting to work on Monday was exhausting. I even slept on the train!

The trip was AMAZING! I had such a nice, relaxing, fun time. It was just what I needed. Which I didn’t even realize until I was sitting at the pool bar, drinking Red Stripe Light, feeling the stresses lifting off my shoulder and making me calm and serene.

I don’t have much to detail about the trip. Besides the wedding and wedding festivities, which were why I was there in the first place, there was a lot of lying around by the pool. And making friends with the bartenders. And drinking slushy rum drinks. And just enjoying myself.

This was my first beachy vacation I’ve taken as an adult. Usually I travel to some place in the States to visit a friend and/or go for a goal/purpose – conference, wedding, tourist attractions. This was the first time that I really took a trip that was 5 days of a lot of nothing. I get it now. You don’t get bored. You RELAX. And enjoy yourself.

I packed a lot of clothes for this trip. I figured I would be on the go and it would be hot and I would be sweaty and I would need to change two or three times a day.

In reality, I wore my bathing suit more than anything else.

Here are how my days usually looked:

Morning (before 10 AM) (I KNOW!!)

• Get up, brush teeth, throw on bathing suit, cover-up, sunscreen
• Head down to breakfast
• Eat a plate full of bacon
• And maybe some other things
• Get beach towels
• Find spot in shady area near bar
• Lay out and read book until 10 AM when the bar opens
• Alternate between drinking at the bar, relaxing in the lazy river, or going down the waterslide.

Afternoon

• Lunch from the pool bar – BLT wrap and fries every day (MORE BACON)
• More drinks
• More reading
• More sun time
• More pool time
• Possibly a nap or two (either indoors or outside)

Evening

• Shower
• Dinner
• More drinks
• Close down terrace bar
• Head to night club to people watch and eat snacks
• Go to bed

Wash, rinse, repeat.

The only difference was for the wedding. It was absolutely beautiful and has totally changed my opinion on destination weddings. Before this trip, I thought I wanted to get married in Chicago, in front of everyone, with a huge party. Now? I think this is the way to go. With this kind of wedding, you can relax and enjoy yourself and know that everyone that shows up is there for you and loves you so much that they are willing to travel for your wedding.

Plus, getting married in front of this kind of backdrop? Ain’t half bad.

Category: A Day in the Life of Me, The Lazies, Travel | 13 Comments »
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