Wine Is My Friend
Posted By Kristabella on May 21, 2008
Can I tell you? It is hard to type when you have had some alcoholic beverages. The backspace key, it becomes your best friend. I shall (who says shall when they are drunk?) try to catch all misspellings, but I’m guessing I won’t. And that will be even funnier.
I went to a bar tonight that had $5 wine night. Wait. I mean it was $5 a glass. Not $5 a bottle. Because that would be awesome if we had $5 bottles. Because a woman that I love, who has worked at my company for almost 40 years, is getting the boot next week. That is sad. And sad means $5 glass of wine night.
But I figured I should post since I have not been good this week already. And my boyfriend David Cook won American Idol. And this might be my las tpost before I run away with him. You know, after he comes to Chicago and sees my beauty and realizes he needs to run away with me.
And really, isn’t no post better than this post? Although, if I left the mistypings (is that a word?) it would be funnier. (Funnier is not an actual word. Except in this context.) (Also, I would like to point out, as a drunk person, I am a very slow typer and this sentence took me 173 minutes to finish.)
Other than that, my friend Jenn got engaged. And sadly, that is the most exciting thing in MY life. And also, my half-sister Kelsey is graduationg from high school this weekend and venturing on to the land of beer and parties (sorry Patty.)
And oh. My. God. This is the worst post ever. I must go to bed and dream of my Jersey Boys singers since I listen to the soundtrack all the time and dream of being Frankie Valli’s girlfriend. But not 80-year old Frankie Valli. Just the actor who plays and sings like him.
Seriously. Worst. Post. Ever. Alcohol + laptops are not a good idea.
About the author
I read this in an “I’m totally ripped” voice and almost peed.
I posted about your boyfriend winning and the fact that he made me whoop. Yeah, I’m still ashamed about that. And I’m assuming it’s that $5 wine that made you not mention him doing Cruise in his underwear.
Wait..not actually doing Cruise but, you know, imitating him.
*I swear no wine was consumed while writing this comment.*
Taj’s last blog post..Uncool Be Thy Name
Hey, you just take all those Jersey Boys and I’ll keep David Cook all to myself. Sounds like a fair deal to me!! 🙂
Erin’s last blog post..Well Crap
$5 wine is fabulous! I’m sorry she lost her job though, that truly is sad.
Sorry about your friend losing her job; been there before, and that sucks. I like this post; good job!
Coast Rat’s last blog post..WEEK #11 – MISSISSIPPI GULF COAST BLUE BIRD UPDATE
i have lately been drawn to the keyboard after a night of drinking. typing with one eye closed and hiccuping. i think drunk blogging is the new drunk dialing.
you did well … couldn’t even tell. as for me, my keypad should lock if i’m above .08.
christa’s last blog post..standoff …
You’re braver than I. Blunk drogging is one I have stayed away from so far. But I don’t get to drink much anymore, so I guess I want to enjoy the experience without messing with my keyboard.
witchypoo’s last blog post..To The Rescue!
Yay for David Cook…loved his Risky Business Guitar Hero commercial. I DID text you about watching for that when you watch the show.
I heart that Jersey Boys soundtrack soooooo much that I’m going to wear it out!
Also, no wine (it’s not even 7:30am!) but a huge bandaid on my index finger so the backspace will be my friend today too.
I should have read this last night with my friend Mr. Wine and then I would have laughed harder. And probably told you that I loved you. Cuz, I do love you man….
Kimberly/ MommaK’s last blog post..Her Prom
The stepson was really bummed that David Cook won.
And I love drunk blogging, but I’m not very good at drunk commenting. I get too sappy or too righteous. 😉
Ree’s last blog post..I’m gonna prove every word I say
Editing the drunk blog is UNFAIR. You are supposed to just type without use of the backspace key, it is supposed to resemble a drunk dial/text in it’s truest form!
Raven’s last blog post..wii fit: the man’s review
I understood it all, so you may not have been as drunk as you think. OR, I am drunk now and am only able to decipher using my keen sense of drunkosity
Jenn’s last blog post..Being A Bitch Is Hard
Ha. ha…
Freaking funny!
Ashmystir’s last blog post..Photo Friday…I heart you…
Too Funny!!
But remember this:
wine+laptop is better than wine+cell phone – nothing worse than drunk dialing!! At least you can go back and read what you typed – drunk voicemails – hmmmm.. can NEVER, EVER be taken back!!
Hope you’re not too hung over today!!
Every night can be $5 bottle of wine night if you’re willing to stay home and drink what you got at the liquor store.
Noelle’s last blog post..There’s no wrong way
What are you talking about? BEST POST EVER!
I love $5 wine night. Know anywhere I can have $5 wine afternoon instead of work today?
Laurel’s last blog post..Other Neurotic Things I Do
Drunk bloging and e mailing is awesome…well done… and I hope the hangover isn’t as severe as I can imagine it would be…
Helmet’s last blog post..TFT…Peeing in the shower
I know I’m already married–and pretty happily at that–but I totally would run away with David if given the chance. NEVER SAY NEVER, BY THE WAY.
I was giddy about his win. POST COMING (obsessive and pathetic one at that).
She Likes Purple’s last blog post..Some Would Say It’s Not A Vacation Unless I Get Naked
Oh, drunk typing is the best! Maybe not as funny as drunk text messaging or drunk booty-calls, but it’s close!!!
$5 wine—–mmmmm!
Danielle’s last blog post..Let the countdown begin
I agree with Raven. No fair editing. I love drunk posts, and a huge part of that fun is the typing.
LOL it took 173 minutes.
Ok, Where Was I?’s last blog post..Sincerely ‘Fro Me To You: Hillbilly Summers
seriously, I love drunk posts… but I request more typos please. no fair that your drunk posts are better than my sober ones 😉
I feel like someone who got to the party too late, only to find everyone else drunk. And now I’m suddenly thirsty.
Candy’s last blog post..The Difference
I snorted half the time while reading this.
Seriously.
In fact, I may have accidentally reverse-snorted onto my delicious pop tart. (A strawberry frosted one, no less.)
You owe me a breakfast pastry.
The Muse’s last blog post..Look! Proof!
seriously..i get the most comments on the posts that i think are the worst.
haha.
ali’s last blog post..my mother forgot my birthday
Drunk blogging rocks. And go on, admit it, you want 80 year old Frankie.
girlplease’s last blog post..Woo hoo!
I am alway busy being naked and doing other stuff bad while under the influence… 😮
Dirty Laundry Diva’s last blog post..A night of hospitality hell…
I’ll have you know that I’m reading this while drinking beers because we’ve run out of wine. *SOB* I’ll also have you know that 90% of my last several months worth of blog posts have been written under the influence of Jack Daniel’s.
Heather B.’s last blog post..Milestones
Too much! *LOL* And I agree with the person above who mentioned drunk dialing as being the worst ever. Drunk dialing and drunk texting would be my vices. Drunk blogging – pshaw!
Lys’s last blog post..80 Days or, in the alternative, What Do You Mean I Have To Pack My Suitcase – Again…
Drunk blogging is THE BEST 🙂
Also – this has nothing to do with anything, but I used to babysit a girl named Kelsey whose mother’s name was Patty and she would have been graduating high school … no, wait … I think she would have graduated last year. But STILL! How crazy is that??
rye’s last blog post..the thing about old people