I’m Available For Babysitting
Posted By Kristabella on May 20, 2008
I didn’t post last night because I am coming down with a cold and I just didn’t feel like it. And what that means is that Flavor Flav was picking his “lady” last night on the season finale of Flavor of Love 3. And I had to know who he picked because I knew someone at work was going to RUIN it for me otherwise. And then I remembered that I’m the only person still watching that show. Well, the only white person at least.
Anyway, but I do need to tell you about my interesting Saturday afternoon with my family. My brother and his family were going over to my mom’s for a belated Mother’s Day celebration. And since my mom lives closer than they do, since they are in a land that is Almost-Wisconsin, I saved some gas money and went over there to see my niece and nephew. And the other people too, of course. Although, really, it’s all about my favorite niece, Skyler.
So when I got there, my brother and sister-in-law were busy doing some chores around the house and the kids were antsy. So Auntie was volunteered to take them for a walk around the block. It was all fine and dandy. They ran, giggled and had a grand old time. That is, until my nephew Noah decided that he was going to try and catch a moth (someone needs to tell this boy that chasing a moth is no way to catch a moth. Flames, son. FLAMES!) (Also, why would anyone want to catch a moth? Ah, to be six years old.)
Noah goes running after said moth and all of a sudden I hear a loud THWHACK! and I see Noah on the ground, crying, because in all that moth chasing, he didn’t see the bump in the sidewalk and fell right over it.
I stifle a laugh and take him back to the house and he gets his tears wiped and his scrapes cleaned. So far, it’s Sidewalks 1, Aunties 0.
After he calms down and mans up, it is decided that the PARK! Let us go to it! Let Auntie take you! Yes! Fun and smiles guaranteed!
So Auntie sucks it up and takes them to the park. It is a bit of a walk, but we finally get there after about 10 minutes or so. The PARK! SWINGS! SLIDES! WOOD CHIPS!
The two yahoos begin climbing and running and sliding and laughing and managing to teach small children all the things you SHOULDN’T do at the park, like climbing up the slide and standing on the rails. (Normally I wouldn’t care, but this one year old was imitating everything Noah did and the mom was MAD. But maybe she needs to have a bit more control over her kid who is so easily influenced. The teenage years are going to suck lady, if you don’t do something about it now. I’m just saying. Peer pressure is a nasty thing.)
After about five seconds of watching, Auntie is REQUIRED to partake in the fun. Which, let me tell you, I’m too big for that tunnel thing, seeing as I almost got my fat ass stuck in it. But we climbed and we went down the slides. Wheeeeee!
After the slides, Skyler noticed a cool jungle gym in the shape of a fire truck. She went over and started jungle-gyming. And then time stopped. She did a simple move to get over a pole and all of a sudden she fell ass over teakettle and BASHED her head on the step on the ground leading up to the fire truck jungle gym thing.
My heart stopped. I FREAKED! I picked her up and panicked. I made sure she wasn’t bleeding, but there was a goose egg on her forehead almost immediately. I grabbed Noah and started walking reallyfast back home.
I didn’t even realize how fast I was walking until I heard Noah yell “Auntie, I need a break.” Poor little guy had to jog to keep up with my pace.
Sidewalks & Jungle Gyms 2, Aunties 0.
In the meantime, I asked Skyler (who is two and a half) questions to make sure she didn’t have a concussion. (I’ll let you re-read that sentence to take in all the hilarity it offers.)
Me: Skyler, how old are you?
Skyler: I don’t know, Auntie.
Me: Are you one?
S: Yes?
Me: Who is that? (points to Noah)
S: Duh, Auntie. That’s Noah.
(plane flies overhead)
Me: What’s that?
S: (face filled with annoyed look) A plane, Auntie. Geesh!
We finally made it back to the house and as I walked up, looking as white as a ghost, I was all “we had an accident.” To which my sister-in-law GASPED! Naturally, since her daughter’s head had a new growth on it. But it broke my heart that my little girl got hurt in my care.
Kim, my sister-in-law, is awesome and was like “do not worry. It would have happened to me just as easily.” Which comforted me, but still. That’s my little buddy!
Skyler said “I’m never ever going to the park ever again, Auntie.” Which I’m sure meant only the rest of the day while we were at grandma’s house. Because she was back to normal minutes later, running around the basement.
But she did have a nice park injury to show all her homies back in the suburbs.
“Those city park are rough, let me tell you,” Skyler tells her neighborhood pre-K friends.
Back to Great-Grandma’s house we played bartender at the bar in the basement. Yes, these two are definitely related to me.
I will have a dirty martini, Auntie.
I shall use this to kick that park’s ass!
Meanwhile Noah entertained himself. A chair with wheels + cement floors = hours of fun. Ah, to be six years old.
Minus a few bumps, bruises and scrapes, it was a great weekend with one of my most favorite people in the whole wide world.
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Awww! She’s a cutie even with that second head protruding from underneath her blonde hair. It’s amazing how kids bounce back from moth catching falls and step face plants. I would certainly need a vodka tonic or two and maybe a week off of work.
I’m glad you had fun with them.
Dingo’s last blog post..Vampires, and Zombies, and Werewolves! Oh My!
So when are you coming to watch Hope. The park situation is a normal day in Hope’s life@@
Melissa’s last blog post..Weirdest. Doctor. Visit. Ever!!!
Awww – poor chook. You’re such a good babysitting auntie, and you never can catch kids when they decide to go all face-planty on you!
alyndabear’s last blog post..Full Steam Ahead.
Don’t be hard on yourself, These things happen. You are a great Auntie and you can babysit my kids anytime.
Ummm, are you free this Friday? 😉
Kimberly/ MommaK’s last blog post..Because I Know You Care About My Hair
Wait kids fall down and get hurt?? No really??
At least they didn’t break a bone this time just
wait it only gets better as they get older! We are
talking put them in the bubble now!
In the end see how you both smiled that’s all that matters 🙂
Awww, Skyler is do darn cute! Don’t worry kids are the most resilient things ever! 🙂
I think you can empathize with Skyler since you had your share of broken bones and stitches as a kid. Not to even mention bumps and bruises. That’s why Moms get gray hairs. And Aunties.
I CAN’T believe there’s a picture of that ridiculous bottle opener! It’s like the lamp in Christmas Story all over again.
Yikes that’s a bad bump there.
You are still a good auntie though. Just wait till you can buy them their first beer at the ball park. You’ll really rawck then. ha. ha. Ok. I’m sick. I’m sure you don’t want to imagine them all grown up yet. Sorry!
=)
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Flavor of Love is still on the air?
Some mighty fine bumps ya’ll got there. Everyone should be proud.
Noelle’s last blog post..There’s no wrong way
Ha! What IS that leg thing she is holding in that photograph?
This is like when AS and I hung out with my little cousins. I forgot to feed them lunch. Then I forgot to get them a drink. Then I let them run out into the street unattended. Oops.
Laurel’s last blog post..Other Neurotic Things I Do
You can babysit the sprog! He’s too old for parks and playgrounds. 🙂
Raven’s last blog post..wii fit: review
Poor kid, will probably grow up and be just like her aunt!
LOL
feeling the “I want to have a baby juices flowing yet”
Huh?
LOL
LarryLilly’s last blog post..Great, now I am being told I am a woman
I totally would have said “he was chasing a moth when all of a sudden the moth went apeshit and beat the crap out of the kid. I couldn’t pull him off of the kid. It was awful. The moth pulled a shank on me so what could I do?”
See? Totally believable.
Ohhh or you could have said that Flavor Flav was in town and one of the hoodrats pushed the kid in order to get closer to Flav. Again, totally believable. (Now I have to see who won. I’m guessing that toothless-gapped wonder Thang 2 (or was it 1)
Ha ha! So cute! I used to work at a daycare and one day, a toddler that I was running after fell and cut his lip open…blood everywhere! Oy, the guilt!
Katie’s last blog post..One More Before I Go
Awww! What a good Auntie 🙂
rye’s last blog post..where I go all girly on your ass
Ack, isn’t that scary?
Ree’s last blog post..I’m gonna prove every word I say
I’m glad she’s okay!
Seriously, though, about the kid who was copying Noah: we taught our nephew recently how to get us a beer, and this other mother didn’t think that was very proper and what if her kid started getting beer out of the kitchen. What was she supposed to do then. Mike said, “I’d drink it, but that’s just me.”
Some parents need to lighten up. Thankfully, sounds like your brother and sister-in-law are fantastic.
She Likes Purple’s last blog post..Some Would Say It’s Not A Vacation Unless I Get Naked
Yikes! Probably won’t be the last war wound that Skyler sustains before hitting 21. Cute kid!
Coast Rat’s last blog post..WEEK #11 – MISSISSIPPI GULF COAST BLUE BIRD UPDATE
I love the 2-year old mentality… “I’m never going to the park again.” and that’s that. hee hee. And your nephew chasing a moth reminds me of catching lightening bugs. Those kids need some lightening bugs!
Jen @ The Cubicle’s Backporch’s last blog post..Jodie Foster and Memorial Day Weekend.
Awww! Poor little thing! And poor you-It’s so awful when they hurt themselves and there isn’t really anything you could have done to stop it.
Danielle-Lee’s last blog post..Frickin’ Muffin top
That sort of stuff happens ALL THE TIME. Really it does.
A friend of mine is a neurologist and he once told me that doctors can even tell the difference between bumps that are the result of clumsiness and bumps that are the result of abuse. Sad, but true.
Jen on the Edge’s last blog post..Two baseball teams’ worth
Cute story. Every time I have my niece and nephew someone gets injured. I give them lots of candy so it makes up for it.
Sarah’s last blog post..My Addiction
Jesus, look what you did to that kid? How do you sleep at night.
(kidding.)
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