Kristabella: Full of Snark Since 1977

Posted By Kristabella on November 16, 2010

I have a question for all of you – do you shut your bedroom door at night when you go to sleep? Like all the way closed? Do you lock it?

See, last week I was talking about this with my friend, as she mentioned she knows EXACTLY what she’ll do if there was an intruder and she needed to protect herself and escape. And it came down to jamming something in front of her ALREADY CLOSED bedroom door. And then I commented that I sleep with the door WIDE OPEN!

I remember hearing on some talk show YEARS ago that sleeping with the door closed was the safest thing to do, especially in the case of a fire. And for some reason, I have filed this away in my head as useful knowledge, but not knowledge I choose to actually use.

See, I have two cats. Two cats that really like to sleep with me. So my door stays open. Sometimes, when they piss me off with their antics at 3 AM, I lock them out. And then I turn on the fan to high so I can’t hear them scratch at the door because they want to be let in.

I would do this every night, see, except I feel bad. I’m never home and if I left them to their own devices in the house all night, I would wake up to chaos. And a lot of puke, I’d imagine.

So the door stays open. In fact, in the spring and fall when the windows are wide open, I even sleep with a door stop in front of the door so the wind doesn’t slam it close in the middle of the night.

This is probably not safe, right? I mean, after talking to my friend, I’m pretty sure I was convinced some person was going to sneak into my house and stab me to death because hey! open door means open invitation, yes?

My old apartment was all wood floors. And they were old wood floors and very creaky. I didn’t worry about anything happening in that place because A) I would hear even one step from a burglar and B) if you wanted to climb up all those stairs, I’m pretty sure I would have an edge on your winded self. My plan then was to just grab the phone and call 911. (Which, not really a good plan.)

I have no plan now. If someone were to break in, the front door is rather close to my bedroom door. I wouldn’t have time to do much of anything. So maybe I should start closing the cats in with me at night? Locking them out? Putting a hammer or crowbar next to my bed?

What say you, blog readers? Want to buy me an alarm system? Or at least a crowbar? Is it time to buy a second thing of pepper spray for my nightstand?

Category: A Day in the Life of Me, Crazy Cat Lady, NaBloPoMo, The Hizzouse | 32 Comments »
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Posted By Kristabella on November 15, 2010

Oh, hello there. You frightened me. I didn’t think anyone would be around this dusty place. You know, this blog that I had vowed to post more on. I literally had to blow dust off the old laptop and remember how to turn it on. Actually, my laptop is always dusty. I never clean my house. It’s kind of disgusting, actually.

Anyway, I had every intention of keeping up my end of the “posting more” bandwagon. But last week, well, let’s just say that I do not handle time changes well, especially the Fall Back one. Because while it is awesome in the mornings – “Hey, it’s only 7 AM, but it feels like 8 AM and I’m rested and holy shit! I have time to blow dry my hair! This is AMAZEBALLS!” – it is not awesome as the day wears on – “Oh, it must be almost 5 PM, almost time to go home. Thank God, this day felt like it was never going to end (looks at clock) WHAT? IT IS ONLY 2:30? HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE? WHEN DO I GET A NAP?!?”

So that was my excuse part of last week. The other days, well I went out drinking on Tuesday night and got home late. And then Wednesday, well once I get out of the habit, it’s hard to get back in the habit. And then all I would write about would be all “hey! Did you know that this time change really fucks me up?” And basically it would be just like this post and well, the end.

And that is the extent of my exciting life and why I haven’t been posting.

I had a list of things I was going to talk about tonight. But then, well I think I ate something rancid from the deli in my office building. I had a salad, and the dressing didn’t taste quite right. I mean, it didn’t taste spoiled, it just wasn’t regular ranch dressing. But since you pay by weight for the salad, it was a $9 salad, so I was going to finish it. That was not the best idea, seeing as an hour later I started to feel like crap. So I took off a little early because I really didn’t want to puke in my trash can. You’re welcome, co-workers.

I’ve been holed up in bed, watching TV since I got home. I choked down some toast and I’m feeling better. I don’t know what the deal was, but I didn’t like it one bit. Especially since I now have an aversion to ranch dressing. Although, on second thought, that’s a good thing for my waistline.

And with that, I shall leave you to go peruse some other, more entertaining blogs. For instance, go read my most recent post on Draft Day Suit. I’m really enjoying writing these college football recaps.

Also, a final note, you should all be excited to know that I recently purchased this:

He should be arriving to his new home shortly. We’re all excited to welcome a new member of the family to the house! Can’t you just FEEL their excitement?

The only way to get them to look at me was to say “Do you want TREEEAAATTTSSSS?” And then I snapped the photo and didn’t give them any treats. This is why they puke on my things.

Category: A Day in the Life of Me, All Things Blogging, BORE-ring, Crazy Cat Lady, Land of Random, NaBloPoMo | 6 Comments »
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Posted By Kristabella on November 4, 2010

So today on Twitter there was this thing about tweeting advice to your 16 year old self. A lot of people had some very profound things to say about their youth. Things about the guys they were with that would hurt them and break their hearts. Things about their parents, or jobs, or friends. Things about their self-esteem and body issues. It was really interesting to watch it unfold, seeing differing perspectives from everyone I follow.

I tried to come up with something horribly profound to tell my 16 year old self. I couldn’t really come up with much. I mean, I was a pretty grounded individual. Some people may say I should have gone out and partied more, been less of a nerd and homebody, but I don’t know that I would change that. I have clearly made up for the fact that I didn’t drink or party in high school. I think starting it earlier would have just been worse and gotten me into trouble.

I wasn’t too angsty of a teen. I remember getting the most upset by the Buffalo Bills losing FOUR SUPER BOWLS IN A ROW more than anything else. Yes, I had my mood swings as a teen, as I’m sure my mom will attest to in the comments, but overall, I think I was a good kid. I had fun with my friends. I enjoyed being a band nerd. I was comfortable in my skin. I mean, hell I was like the only girl in high school who didn’t wear dresses or make-up or do my hair every single day. I was happy in a ponytail, jeans and a Notre Dame t-shirt/sweatshirt most of the time.

Thinking back, I’m pretty proud of my 16 year old self. She was smart and funny, had a lot of great friends, some she’s still friends with to this day. She could have fun without getting into trouble. She loved her family, probably not her younger sister so much at that time. She knew what she wanted to do with her life. She was going to be a sportscaster and do something with sports and no one was going to talk her out of it. She also thought she was going to go to Notre Dame, but that turned out to be the best thing to ever NOT happen in her life.

Sure, I could have gone to more dances and school functions, maybe joined the school newspaper. But would those things have made 33 year old Kristin a happier individual? Probably not.

Granted, I’m sure my life has not turned out how 16 year old Kristin wanted. I know she figured she’d be on ESPN and famous, with a hot husband and a boat load of kids. But I would like to tell 16 year old KJ that it is OK. Things turn out how they are supposed to. And you’re where you need to be and it will happen. It’s better for you for it to happen later in life than when you were 25. Everything happens for a reason and you’re on the path you’re supposed to be on.

Because let’s face it, 16 year old me, not a whole hell of a lot has changed in the last 17 years, has it?

(I just love how I’m wearing a sweatshirt I puffy painted MYSELF and a homemade scrunchie.) (Also, 90% of my photos from high school have me with my mouth open just like this. Always klassy with a K.)

Category: Age is Just a Number, Land of Random, NaBloPoMo, Writing | 14 Comments »
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Posted By Kristabella on November 3, 2010

So look at that, I failed on the second day of this whole “write more in the month of November” thing I started. (It really needs some sort of catchy title.) But in my defense, I didn’t post on Tuesday because I was in a sour mood. I was irritated by something most of the afternoon and the election results just soured my mood even more. I actually tried to sit and write a post but it was all “HATE PEOPLE! ANGRY! HULK SMASH!!!!11!!!!” So, you’re welcome.

And now this post is really not a post either since this is all you’re going to get, plus some photos. Because tonight I went to the Blackhawks game. With my boss. She is in town and asked me this afternoon if I would be interested. And well, I can’t turn down free hockey tickets. Also, we bought them on Stub Hub two hours before the game and got pretty decent seats.

The Hawks lost, but it was interesting to watch a Chicago sporting event through the eyes of a non-Chicagoan. My boss loved the fact that the beer vendors came all the way up to the upper deck. I told her this was one thing I was sure was a Chicago and/or Midwestern thing. She was also surprised at the amount of booze choices and the booze advertisements throughout the game. Welcome to Chicago, we’re a drinking city with a sports problem.

And thankfully I was driving (and with my boss) so I only had one beer. Because God forbid I end up doing something inappropriate, like I am wont to do, especially at sporting events.

The Rod Carew statue in Minneapolis hasn’t been the same since my visit.

Category: A Dash of the Crazy, A Day in the Life of Me, NaBloPoMo, Sports | 6 Comments »
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Posted By Kristabella on November 1, 2010

Actually, it was quite sunny today. Not warm, per se, but I can’t really complain about 50 degree temps and abundant sunshine on the first day of November, now can I?

How’s that for the world’s most boring opening to a blog post? Especially the first blog post in over a week.

Well as most people in the blog world know, November is NaBloPoMo. It’s a month where you vow to write every single day of the month. I have participated in the past. It was so much fun, this photo pretty much sums up my thoughts on it:

But here’s the thing, my posting has been very sparse of late. I think a lot of it is because I’ve had some blows to my confidence in the last year and I’ve allowed someone to make me feel like my writing abilities suck. And I’m not going to let that person do that to me anymore.

So I’m going to give posting more often a try. It will be my modified version of NaBloPoMo. Because let’s face it, I don’t have enough clever things to say for a whole 30 days. And also sometimes I go out and get drunk and pass out on my bed in my clothes with all the lights on in the house. And on those nights? I can’t even remember to take off my shoes, let alone blog.

That’s the plan. A higher volume of posting in November. And hopefully it will get me back in the habit of writing and bring my confidence back up. Also, we haven’t heard from Bacon or my cats in awhile. And they are tired of being silenced. So join me on this ride, won’t you?

Category: All Things Blogging, NaBloPoMo | 25 Comments »
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