Target Is Supposed To Be A Happy Place
Posted By Kristabella on March 1, 2009
Guess what I spent my Sunday afternoon doing? I spent it in jail after I punched a bitch in the face in the Bath aisle at Target.
Well, not really. But I came close to it. In fact, I was waiting for the bitch to rumble with me in the cat food aisle.
I’m so going to end up sounding like an old lady, but where the fuck has common courtesy gone? I mean, I’m quite used to it not being around on the internet. The internet is a place where you get called out for being a bitch with no sense of humor. But in real life, not through a computer box, I expect people to act just a wee bit human.
So today I made a run to Target. I really only needed to go for light bulbs and figured since it is March, I could take a look at the spring clothes since I will actually get to wear them in a few short days. What I didn’t go there for was rage and wanting to shove some bitch up against shower rods.
I was happily browsing the bath aisles, looking at options for my new house. I figured it was about time to get a new shower curtain and a new bathroom “motif” since I was moving into a new place. I thought I’d check Target to see what they had. I pulled into one of the aisles and this chick had her cart smack dab in the middle of the aisle and was standing and bending over, making it IMPOSSIBLE to get through.
So I rolled up on her ass, kind of cleared my throat, thinking she would see the error of her ways and get the fuck out of the way. Really, how hard is it to pull your cart to one side of the aisle? THIS ISN’T WALMART!
When she didn’t move, I let out a very nice, passive-aggressive sigh and turned my cart around. I went down the next aisle and came up the aisle she was in and totally put my cart in her way. Since I was being passive-aggressive with my loud sigh, I wasn’t actually expecting this 20-something to say something to me.
I was wrong.
HER: You could have just said excuse me.
ME: You could have not had your cart in the middle of the aisle.
HER: I can put my cart wherever I damn well want to.
ME: Wow, OK bitch. I don’t think you need to buy a new shower rod, you can just pull out the one that is stuck on your ass.
OK, I didn’t really say the last part. I did call her a bitch and turned around and went to the food aisles. A little quicker than normal, I might add. I was so waiting for her to run through the aisles and attack me. But I think she thought better of it when I was a whole foot taller than her.
Also? SHE NEVER FUCKING MOVED HER CART.
I am still kind of pissed about it. WHAT THE FUCK? Is it SO hard to move your cart to the edge of the aisle? I mean, it’s fucking Target. We’re not claiming land here in the 1800s. Putting your cart in the middle of one of the Bath aisles isn’t going to give you the rights to all the towels you can use. It’s just a fucking Target aisle. You won’t be getting acres in Topeka, Kansas out of this.
Plus, it’s Sunday afternoon. Target is always busy on the weekends. You think you’re the only one who needs to look at bath stuff?
What happened to apologizing for blocking the aisle? That is what I do when that happens. I never mean to block it and get in people’s way, but I get caught up in looking at things, so I always apologize for being in someone’s way. How come it works so well at the grocery store? I never run into this problem in the grocery store. People are always mindful of their carts. What happened to people being respectful? What happened to people having common courtesy? I expect this shit at Walmart. I don’t at Target. Target is always a happy place.
Or maybe I was a tad testy because I decided to go out on Sunday when it was snowing, as opposed to Saturday, when it wasn’t snowing. Or maybe I am mad at the world because I am getting sick, my first cold of the winter, right before I leave for Arizona.
Good thing warm weather makes it all better. T minus 3 days.
About the author
She was probably surprised you called her on it. We went to Walmart on Saturday and I figured out why we don’t go there. Target is happy most of the time. If you’d like, next time you go, I’ll go with you and if anyone bothers you, I’ll sit on em….cuz I’m fat…
Sheris last blog post..Sickety Sick Sick
Oh….ONE cart in the middle of the aisle? Try carts multiplying in front of your eyes at Jewel EVERY day of the week…and ALWAYS in the middle of the aisle. The last time I called out a younger dude for cart in tht aisle, he said “See, this is why I don’t come to this Jewel. The people are so rude”. I told him people wouldn’t be “rude” if he’d keep his effing cart out of the middle of tha aisle. Of course, I then ran into him in EVERY other aisle I went down. So I just threw Gram in front to clear the way…even youngish rude dudes don’t mess with 85 year old broads.
Sure, you’re allowed to put your cart wherever you want. But, you’re a douche if you do. Unless, for some reason they close the Target up JUST so you can shop there all by yourself. Which is totally what they do for me.
Rhis last blog post..One Year
I guess that you have missed out on all of my discussions of retail etiquette?
You should check them out.
Phils last blog post..We gotta get out of this place
See, that’s when you passive-aggressively ram your cart into the backs of her legs.
nancypearlwannabes last blog post..Hello From My Snow Coccoon!
My patent passive-aggressive move is to say very clearly YOU’RE WELCOME whenever I hold the door for someone or do something courteous and don’t get a thank you back. They know what I mean.
Amanda Nicoles last blog post..Friday link fest: lazy weekend crafts
People are effing rude everywhere, even Target, it’s ridiculous. I am rapidly becoming a hermit.
Ravens last blog post..repeat travel offender
Um this is my favorite post that you have ever written..seriously some good stuff here!
sensibly sassys last blog post..Just When I Think I Have Seen It All
I can’t believe she spoke to you like that. Any NORMAL person would have moved out of the way AND SAID SORRY.
Angellas last blog post..Mad At Dad?
This is funny in an odd sense but holy cow either it is near a full moon or every woman I know currently has PMS. I’ve all over some folks in the freakin’ aisle when they won’t move. We don’t have the luxury of a Target, I have Walmart and a half-assed Kmart….either way, people have forgot how to behave and be kind….and the whole world has PMS right now…
on a similar note, while in the airport recently I was reading a book, Jen Lancaster and if you haven’t read her, she is flippin’ hilarious. Anyway, there were tons of empty seats but this woman comes and sits down directly across from me. And, every time I would burst out laughing and start shaking, she would raise her eyes over her book at me like I was the idiot….
So, in my passive aggressive southern hospitality, I reached into my bag, I got me a piece of gum (which I never chew b/c of my TMJ but my husband thought I might want it, so he just stuck it in the bag). I started chewing and smacking and blowing bubbles relentlessly.
Do you know, that woman never looked up when I smacked or popped the gum, but every time I laughed, she gave me this rude look……….
Finally after an hour or so of this and my jaw was killing me, she left, so what’s up with people? Aisle blocking, laughter-killers and gum smackers…what has the world come to, lol
Jerri Anns last blog post..Parenting Sites 411
I hate when people are like that! I was shopping at Woodfield Mall yesterday (1st mistake) coming up some stairs when some punk kid decided to walk down the stairs right in front me, he and his friends laughing about it. I stood infront of him for a few seconds and barely moved out of his way (2nd mistake). I wish I had not moved or that I had said something to him.
Grrr! People are so self-centered and rude! 🙁
tmcs last blog post..NaBloPoMo, Anti-procrastination and Maya Angelou
Seriously, it’s like this all over anymore. I am constantly annoyed and amazed (although I should be over that by now, I guess) at the lack of courtesy these days. People have even rammed INTO ME with their carts (I’m little and I think alot of people think I’m just a kid so they don’t need to be respectful of me or something) and STILL didn’t say anything. And standing in the middle of the aisles with their carts, even after noticing me coming up behind them, they will still just stand there and not allow me to go around. One of these days….TO THE MOON, ALICE!!!! lolol
Giggle Pixies last blog post..Hands Off, Ladies! He’s Mine!
Wow… I can’t believe she even SAID something to you! What an idiot.
You would have been totally justified in whomping her.
Decembers last blog post..Warning: RANT to follow
I had a similar experience at Target last week! I thought it was just me being cranky so I’m thrilled to know I’m not alone.
I think it’d be awesome to start sneezing on her. Without covering it. Just OPEN SNEEZING. Watch how fast her ass would move then.
Mochas last blog post..Signing My Life Away For Meth-Making Materials
Elston Target? I regularly want to fight people while shopping at the Target on Elston.
See, you just need to come to AZ a-sap. The warm sun will do you well…and you’ll magically forget about snow, sickness and snotty chicas!
Miss Es last blog post..Letter ‘G’
What I don’t get is why YOU should have to say excuse me when it’s obvious that she is aware that SHE is blocking the aisle with HER cart. What a bitch.
La Petite Chics last blog post..Grace Six
This is exactly why I will take two Advil PM with dinner on Friday night just so I can be at the Target at 8:15 AM on Saturday mornings.
Seriously – there’s maybe 15 people in the store and the associates are actually helpful (I had one actually offer to look in the stock room for the cover to a trash can!) and not wish Ebola on humanity.
I hate when a perfectly good Target experience is ruined. It is seriously one of my favorite stores. That being said, not all Targets are created equal(ly) – the one on Elston is particularly low rent. The Target on Addison, however, is a Nordstrom-like experience.
dianas last blog post..Pump up the volume
Some people? Are just idiots with no manners. Sad, but true.
aunties last blog post..When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie…
Ooh! Like the guy who slammed into me on the street and huffed in impatience and said “Excuse YOU!” even though I 1) attempted to move for him, 2) was blocked by two friends, where he had his side entirely to himself.
Some people just like being jerks.
Mooses last blog post..This Is a Tough One For Me To Admit
off topic, but wanted to let you know that the weather is off the charts here. Just for You!
What is this Target of which everyone speaks?
witchypoos last blog post..Skinny Bitch Gets Hers
Trolly rage. Where I live someone jumped the q in the local supermarket, then a lady got her boyfriend to punch them, only he punched the wrong man, the man fell over and died. He had done nothing wrong. He got sent down for murder.
Kind of makes you think?
skys last blog post..Currys GRIFFIN ITRIP AUTO for only 39.99
I encounter bitches like this all the time at work. People who don’t know what the word “excuse me” means. It’s so ridiculous. Did you really call her a bitch? That’s awesome!
Ugh. Sorry you had to live through that arrogance. There is no shortage of asshats, esp. on a Sunday afternoon. I live on the northshore, in what I like to refer to as, “The Land of Entitlement.” Gawd help the crazy mofo beyotches who try to run that number on me. Next time you meet one like this, feel free to bat your lashes and say with lots of concern, “Excuse me, isn’t that your vehicle they announced they are getting ready to tow?” You’re welcome.
Was she in a scooter? Because those scooter bitches really get my blood boiling.
I haven’t yet had a rude Target visit here, but going to WinCo is always an exercise in self restraint.
When did the world decide that rude was the way to be?
Erins last blog post..Fun Friends
you cannot blame target for this…you have to blame the asshat of a lady (and calling her a lady is a stretch)
ps. i love when you get testy!!!
alis last blog post..weekendables
People are just so unbelievably bitchy sometimes. Once at Trader Joes I encountered a woman standing on one side of an aisle looking across towards the wines on the other side of the aisle. As you might imagine, I pushed my card past her to get by (not STOPPING or HANGING OUT and blocking her view or anything, just walked past her). APPARENTLY, she was ticked that I got in her sight line and sighed something about ‘People are so rude’. To which I, totally aghast, blurted out “ARE YOU EVEN SERIOUS?!?!?!” There was no smackdown but SERIOUSLY . . . it’s one thing if someone shoves in front of you (as people often do at TJs) but if you honestly think that you should have the entire Trader Joe’s wine aisle on lockdown for yourself on a Sunday afternoon you are HIGH.
When I run into this situation I either move thier cart myself, or ram it with mine until it moves out of my way. Maybe that makes me just as much of a bitch, but I don’t care. People act like they don’t know how to behave in public anymore.
Sarahs last blog post..Is it a Sideboard or Buffet?
I got in two similar altercations on Saturday. Loves it.
I wish we could have seen that scene on YouTube! Hahahahahahahahaha!
Stacy Quartys last blog post..Bloggy Bits- The Weight of Your Word
I would have called her a bitch and ran to the nearest bathroom. Afraid that i might have peed my pants from the altercation though, i’ve been known to call nary a bitch out.
gorillabunss last blog post..40 is the new 60
“Really, how hard is it to pull your cart to one side of the aisle? THIS ISN’T WALMART!”
This is why I love you. ANd you would not BELIEVE how often this type of shit happens in the Bronx.
Oh, wait. You actually might.
metalias last blog post..Thoughts from watching a rerun of Unwrapped WAY too late at night, after being stuck inside all day. (Thanks a lot, BLIZZARD.)
At least you called her out on her rudeness. I’m such a scaredy-cat, I would have left the aisle completely and went back to it when she was gone… or left my cart at the end of the aisle and squeezed my body past her without bothering her… or something equally wishy-washy! 😉
Nickis last blog post..Baaaaaaaad Sheep!
“This isn’t Walmart” — priceless.
(Sorry I haven’t commented in a while … babies are time sucks, yo.)
She Likes Purples last blog post..One month
You cannot believe how hard I laughed at this post.
Mariannes last blog post..Loving Your Spouse When You Have a Small Child
this is a hilarious post.
I run into this shit all the time. Depends on my mood whether or not I will get in someome’s face.
She would have gone down.
Your title says it all. This post gives me angina.