Thursday Night Bullets – Witty Text FAIL

Posted By on November 12, 2009

  • I’m stealing a page out of Rhi’s book and doing bullets as my last post of the week.
  • Because I have nothing to write about.
  • See, I have to be pretty focused when I write each night. And the Bears are on right now and I can only pay attention to one thing.
  • I didn’t used to always be like this.
  • I blame my DVR for my utter lack of an attention span.
  • What did you say?
  • So, witty text sent. Witty text, not returned. It’s OK though. I’m glad I “put myself out there” since it is something I NEVER do.
  • Even if really, it was such a pansy way of “putting yourself out there.”
  • Also, I’m sure the He’s Just Not That Into You people are laughing because they are like “well if he didn’t call when he said he would call, he’s (CHORUS) JUST NOT THAT INTO YOU!”
  • To which I say to those people “fuck off. There was no way texting him could make it worse. Because hi! Still not calling!”
  • Rich Eisen is the host of the halftime show on NFL Network. I worked in the NFL when the NFL Network first got started. I met Rich Eisen  in Chicago, oddly enough, at a party in the Signature Room in the John Hancock Building.
  • I should mention, I was pretty drunk.
  • I took a cab back to the hotel with Rich Eisen and a few others.
  • I only called him Rich Eisen, his full name, not just Rich.
  • At some point later in the evening/early morning, we were all at this crowded bar in the hotel. Rich Eisen was on one side on the bar, I was way on the other.
  • For some reason I thought it was a good idea to scream out, yes, SCREAM OUT, “RICH EISEN!”
  • And then he pointed at me and yelled “Hey! KRISTIN!”
  • I have a lot of these stupid stories.
  • Like the time Jay Mohr called me cute.
  • Tomorrow I’m going back to IKEA. I’m planning on purchasing a futon for my second bedroom, a new TV stand and hopefully a cabinet for my living room so I can finally unpack all the boxes.
  • I’ve only lived here for oh, six months.
  • In my post yesterday, I talked about bloggers just understanding blogging and Twitter. This was not more apparent than when I was in Atlanta in September. After suffering some bad heartburn in the middle of the night, and not being able to sleep, I Twittered about it. At like 4 AM. The next morning, Darcey came in to wake me up or something and she said “do you need me to get you some Tums?” Which was funny, because we hadn’t spoken for like 10 hours.
  • I love that about social media.
  • My family and non-blogging friends think it is kind of weird.
  • At least I’m not signing up for Farmville.
  • Yet.
  • I have Google Wave now. I still don’t understand it completely, but I feel like in a year, EVERYONE will be using it.
  • It’s a TIME SUCK!
  • You’d think I was doing NaBloPoMo with how useless this post is.
  • So tell me, are you doing anything exciting this weekend? Anything exciting that doesn’t involve Allen wrenches?

About the author

Kristabella, who also answers to “Hey! Drunk Girl!”, is a reformed band geek with an amazing ability to drink most people under the table. You can read her inane ramblings here, where she talks about her exciting life as a spinster with two cats and a fascination for Bacon.


26 Responses to “Thursday Night Bullets – Witty Text FAIL”

  1. JRM says:

    I have a big crush on Jay Mohr. Sigh.

  2. I’m going through my kids’ toy room like Sherman marched on Atlanta. When I’m done, nothing will be left.

  3. Rhi says:

    One of my favorite things about hanging out with bloggers is communicating via Twitter when we are sitting right next to each other. Kali, Kerri and I do this to talk about other people in the nail salon while we’re getting pedicures.

  4. Angella says:

    I called Matthew first. And he didn’t even give me his number – I got it off of a bulletin.

    10 years and three kids later, I think it was a smart move. Tell the haters to suck it.

    I’m working all weekend. BOOOOOOOOO. Hope yours is more fun!
    .-= Angella´s last blog ..Because It Needs To Be Said =-.

  5. -R- says:

    I have already told you about my love for your NFL stories. Rich Eisen has always seemed like a cool guy to me.

    We are getting B’s one year pictures taken this weekend, so that should be either a disaster or really fun, depending on B’s mood. But I think it will be fun.
    .-= -R-´s last blog ..I Know It Could Be Worse =-.

  6. I have Google Wave, too! Be my Wave friend?
    .-= nancypearlwannabe´s last blog ..I Will Date Every Single One Of You =-.

  7. Andrea says:

    I’m going to a birthday party…for a six year old that’s not mine. Meh. I’ll need an appointment with Drs Barley & Hops after that…..Good luck furniture shopping.
    As for the unreturned text: I say BAH. Boys are dumb. Go out this weekend and meet a cuter one!
    .-= Andrea´s last blog ..So I’m all like, ‘Shit’. =-.

  8. Dots says:

    well, clearly he blows. you dodged a bullet. pun intended.
    .-= Dots´s last blog ..Vote now and vote often! =-.

  9. lceel says:

    Jientje is going to be here. She’s coming in tomorrow morning (Saturday, 5:20AM) and she’ll be here through midday Tuesday the 17th. But I’ll spend the weekend showing her around. Doing anything Sunday?
    .-= lceel´s last blog ..Friday Haiku – Jientje =-.

  10. How did Mikey V not make your bullet list? 🙂
    .-= Rebecca (Bearca)´s last blog ..I can’t believe I’m posting this =-.

  11. Kristie says:

    WTF is Google Wave?! Must investigate!

    Also, Boo to the man who didn’t call or text, he was obvs stupid.
    .-= Kristie´s last blog ..Mommy blogging =-.

  12. Darcey says:

    And I was totally serious about getting you some Tums. In fact, I contemplated running to the store to get you some before you woke up, but I didn’t want you to wake up in a strange house and find me not there.

    Let’s see…. tonight, my girls are taking me and my friend Jamie out to celebrate our birthdays before everyone scatters for the holidays. Tomorrow, my dad is showing up but-crack-of-dawn early (oh, hello, hangover!) so we can start installing the hardwoods at my house. And that will take up all of my weekend, I’m sure.
    .-= Darcey´s last blog ..PINK! Hair =-.

  13. ali says:

    you KNOW you are going to have a farm. It’s only a matter of time.
    Mark my words, Johnson. (this will never get old, eh?)
    .-= ali´s last blog ..A Fictional Five…or Something Like It… =-.

  14. slynnro says:

    Stay strong against Farmville dude.
    .-= slynnro´s last blog ..EYESHADOW FACE OFF! =-.

  15. gorillabuns says:

    you should be proud of me but i only do scrabble and won’t do Farmville. and screw the quizzes.

    and really, since I’m all old and shit, what is Google Wave? I’m thinking I’m too old for this internet shit.
    .-= gorillabuns´s last blog ..yabba dabba doo! =-.

  16. Moose says:

    On your last bullet point, I thought you said ALIEN WRENCHES. Which you did not. But I thought it would be a stellar addition to any weekend.
    .-= Moose´s last blog ..Unemployment. Or Being Employed By Life. No, Seriously. =-.

  17. Jessica says:

    Love the next to the last bullet point. Mostly because at the beginning of your post I started thinking “Hey, that could be my next blog post – cause i can only post so many fortune cookies!”

    He doesn’t know what he’s missing, but great job on getting out there!
    .-= Jessica´s last blog ..Fortune Cookie Says… =-.

  18. tracey says:

    Do NOT tell me that Google wave is cool. Because I am SPENT. NO MORE SOCIAL MEDIA SITES. DONE. Finito.
    .-= tracey´s last blog ..Excuses, excuses… =-.

  19. Kristin says:

    I’m off to the toy store to get gifts for a one year old’s birthday and possibly some Christmas presents for my nephew. We are going to see him at Thanksgiving and it’s easier to drop presents off now instead of mailing them later.

    I have Google Wave now too. Still need to check out the video to figure out what I’m doing.

    Hope you have a good weekend!
    .-= Kristin´s last blog ..Waiting =-.

  20. stef says:

    good for you, putting yourself out there! truly i need to start blogging again, because then you could read that i have been stood up twice (!) in the last two weeks (!!) by two different guys (!!!). not that it’ll stop me from setting up a date with someone else. because honestly? if i got down on myself because i had the misfortune of setting up dates with two random assholes in a row, i’d never date again! (not that i’ve completely ruled out becoming a nun.)
    .-= stef´s last blog ..facebook fun. =-.

  21. Jessica says:

    Dude is stupid because YOU…are a BEAST, probably the BOSSEST BEAST I know!!! hahaha! I am proud of you for sending that text!!! It was hilarious!

  22. Nina says:

    Great post, as usual 🙂 And: JAY MOHR said something to you??? Even something super nice??? OMG where are my smelling salts. You know that guy? He talked to you? Wow. I saw him on the Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson (love him) and Jay Mohr was hilarious! You’re one lucky American girl! Best wishes from Germany 🙂
    .-= Nina´s last blog ..She’s thinkin’: How did I get here? =-.

  23. Nina says:

    P.S. that cop guy? he’s obviously stupid!
    .-= Nina´s last blog ..She’s thinkin’: How did I get here? =-.

  24. Jennifer R says:

    Good for you for sending that text, I know I wouldn’t have the balls to.
    And maybe he lost his phone or something like that.
    Also, what is this Wave that you speak of?

  25. I don’t get heartburn, so this one time I was on a business trip & woke up in the middle of the night feeling like I was having a heart attack (or at least how I imagined a heart attack would feel, after drinking waaay too much) (sometimes I drink way too much on business trips because I am very professional and business trips are boring). Anyway, I was really freaked out, but also pretty drunk, so I just stayed in bed & tried not to die. The next day I was talking to one of the vendors I work with (who also happens to be an MD) and I was like, hey K! Last night I had a heart attack, but I was too tired and drunk to call 911 or get out of bed, and get this, I lived! Awesome, right?

    Yeah, she explained that when you pass out drunk (after also eating a shitload of chinese food, did I mention that?), sometimes you get heartburn.

    There was no point to this story, but I just spent 20 minutes typing this comment on my phone, so it’s getting submitted.
    .-= operation pink herring´s last blog ..Four posts in one =-.

  26. Sheri says:

    OK, I’m behind because I do Farmville….quit laughing. My farm rocks, and the house I bought is bigger than the one I live in now….quit laughing. I walked this weekend, watched ND lose, cried about ND losing, and got my period (which explains a lot).

    And the guy, his freaking loss for not being able to see the wonder that is Kristabella!!!!