I Suck At Wheel Of Fortune
Posted By Kristabella on September 24, 2008
I cannot write a long post. Why? Well, for one, I’m tired. Because not only did I skip out on my daily dose of The Golden Girls last night to read Twilight, I read from midnight to 3 AM. At that time, I decided that I finally needed to go bed. I had a full day planned today with my Grandma, running errands and doing chores around her house. So I pried that book out of my own hands and put it down and turned off the light. I was tired, clearly from my adventure earlier in the day, but I could not fall asleep. I kept tossing and turning and murmuring (that was for you Metalia) out loud to no one in particular “I LOVE YOU EDWARD! BELLA! HOW CAN THIS RELATIONSHIP WORK OUT? I WANT TO GO TO SCHOOL WITH A BUNCH OF RIDICULOUSLY GOOD LOOKING VAMPIRES!”
Finally, I think it was about 4:30 or so before I finally drifted into sleep. I so wish I was a vampire and didn’t have to eat or sleep. Think of all the time I would have to read! And how skinny I would be! And ridiculously good looking! Life would be awesome! I mean, minus the whole blood-sucking thing.
Dear Twilight, now I see what everyone was talking about. I get it now. It took me until book four to realize how good Harry Potter was. I am a slow learner. I heart you.
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So today I ran out of toilet paper. I’d like to say that is because I’m unemployed and am conserving my monetary funds. But really I’m just lazy. So while I was in two stores today that sold toilet paper, I chose to steal a roll from my grandma instead.
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My grandma and my mom have a tradition of watching Wheel of Fortune together every day. My mom gets home from work about 6 and they watch it together every day at 6:30. It’s pretty funny. My mom is awesome at the game and should totally be on the show. My grandma just yells at Pat Sajak for molesting all the female contestants.
And what do I do when I watch with them? I add thoughtful, witty commentary. And yell out inappropriate answers to the puzzles.
Have you guys seen Wheel in awhile? They’ve pretty much run out of new things for puzzles. They now have a category called “What Are You Doing?” So I was like “what the hell is the answer to these puzzles? Sipping on some gin and juice?”
Close. Today’s answer was “Kicking back in a cabana on the beach.” Sippin’ on gin n’ juice. Laid back.
The best is to just shout things out. It really throws my mom off. In one of tonight’s puzzles, I was convinced the last word was PARASITES. I wasn’t sure how that would be worked into a puzzle on Wheel of Fortune, but hey, times, they are a-changing. I think one guess I yelled out was OMELETTE PARASITES!
The real answer? Totally Opposites. Or something.
The final round’s category was “household items”. And it was two words, both four letters each. My first guess was SPIC SPAN. (See why I wouldn’t be good? I’d be like the girl with Tourettes just yelling four-letter household item words out. DUST PANS! FOUR SALT! FOOD BOWL! WINE CORK! DEAD CATS!)
Finally some of the letters came up and I guessed, rather shouty I might add, PAIN MEDS! Which would only be an answer on the SKID ROW VERSION OF WHEEL OF FORTUNE!
The actual answer was BUNK BEDS.
Did I mention it was “Teen Best Friends Week” on Wheel of Fortune?
Now I’m off to finish Twilight so I can start on New Moon!
About the author
Bwhahaa! I used to watch Wheel with my grandparents. I have to say I’m pretty horrible at it. Though I think the Tourette’s game sounds like lots of fun….now if we can just figure out how to make a drinking game out of it, it would be a blast!
Melissas last blog post..And Me Without My "I’m Blogging This" Underwear!!
Gah…I’ve resisted getting sucked into the Tweeny Twilight books, but you are weakening my resolve.
Where did the lovely advertisements come from?
And you crack me up with Wheel of Fortune…yes, throw me off my game cuz I had “parasites” in my brain after you kept yelling it out, but it was funny. More fun than just regularly watching Wheel!
Wow. Thanks for starting my day out with a laugh! I was laughing out loud at your Wheel answers!
celticbuffys last blog post..ABC, No It’s an EKG
Wheel of Fortune went down the tubes went you could no longer go shopping for you prizes, like 25 years ago.
Dutchess of Kickballs last blog post..I need an adjustment
I haven’t watched Wheel of Fortune in centuries. Good to know ol’ Sajak is still getting his piece on the side.
nancypearlwannabes last blog post..Testing… Testing…
I knew you’d like Twilight! I’m mad at myself because I read all the spoilers for Breaking Dawn, which I am currently reading. Oh well, its still so good!
OMG, I have the craziest story about the Wheel of Fortune EVER. Yet, I’m afraid their legal team will come find me. I’ll have to tell you on the down low.
whoorls last blog post..La Plates Giveaway
It is universally well known that I should have been on Wheel of Fortune. I AM AWESOME AT IT. But I can’t afford to fly to California, so alas…
I prefer the old version, when they used to show the winner a room full of valuable items, and then some $35. ceramic pigs and let them buy what they could with the money. Until eventually you had $35. left and HAD to buy the ceramic pig. Ahhh…those were the days.
Candys last blog post..Mouth, Meet Soap
Haha I love that you were throwing your mom off. I used to watch that when I was younger and I was So Good!
Scarlets last blog post..Get Gone
I haven’t watched the Wheel since they got rid of the “floating head picking out prizes” feature. That was my favorite part.
Noelles last blog post..10. The Towne Crier
the last time i saw it i felt like pat sajak had gone insane. he demanded why people on set were eating cake and why wasn’t he getting some cake. he was shouting it. it was very clear to me that he is just phoning it in these days. by the end of the show he had cake. wtf.
micheles last blog post..My Morning
I haven’t watched Wheel in years, but I actually used to be pretty good at it. Although…I have to admit being a yeller as well, and waaaaaay too early in the game I would yell out some pretty stupid answers too, but none of them were as good as yours. You crack me up!
Evil Geniuss last blog post..I Think He’s On to Me…
You know when I was done with Wheel? When VANNA STOPPED SERVING A PURPOSE! She doesn’t even spin the letters anymore, they’re electronic. She just touches a lit up screen. Lab rats do that!! Now if they could get lab rats in evening gowns to touch the letters, they might win me back.
thec oconutdiariess last blog post..Obama Could Win “Dancing With the Stars!”
Man, I need to get into this Twilight business. I’m always behind, too. I didn’t read HP until the 4th book and even then I was skeptical. After that I preordered the books!
Kristies last blog post..I guess I’m official now.
Bet you didn’t know that Pat Sajak is one of UCSB’s most distinguished graduates.
…with my mind on my money and my money on my mind (at least that’s how it goes in my head, I have NO IDEA if those are the real lyrics (?) because I suck)
dabbys last blog post..You’ve lost that loving feeling
Got to tell you I didn’t want to read those vampire books my daughter begged and pleaded with me telling me they are the best…I bought the series for her for her birthday well I read Twilight in one day last week and last night at 11:30 PM I finished the third book Eclipse. I begged my daughter not to give me the fourth book until Friday night because I haven’t done anything in my house for a week! Ugh!!
my mom is RIDICULOUS good at WoF. she once guessed – ACCURATELY, i might add – “woody woodpecker,” before a single letter was on the board.
it sucks playing scrabble with her, too.
Alices last blog post..36 reasons hillary is mean
I just bought Twilight, but haven’t started it yet. It’s good?
I have, however, read every Anita Blake book that Laurell Hamilton puts out.
Hanks last blog post..No Time For Anything But Random Notes
My Grandmother still watches Wheel (as she calls it) every night. If she doens’t know the answer, she likes to call one of us to help her figure it out before the person on TV does. She’s a trip!
Your stupid website crashed my work computer. But I FINALLY added you to my links list. YOU MUST BE SO HAPPY!
So I guess I’m officially the lone holdout on the Twilight series, huh?
slynnros last blog post..Scenes from a Marriage: I’m Tired From My Business Trip and This is All I Got Ed.
Dammitall…I’m really close to buying Twilight. I’ve stayed away as long as I could. Dammit.
The Over-Thinkers last blog post..Another one for the "Holy Crap I was a HUGE DORK"-Pile
It PAINS me that there wasn’t a teen best friends week while I was a teen.
I’m writing to Wheel and requesting a Blogging Best Friends Week. Unfortunately, I think you’d be a liability, so I’d probably go with Stara. I bet she is good at guessing.
Rhis last blog post..You know what annoys me?
I was a Wheel nerd back in the day, but I like your version better.
witchypoos last blog post..Witty Comebacks
My grandma and I used to watch Wheel of Fortune while she babysat my little sister and I, and I would get SO! EXCITED whenever I was even close to knowing the answer. I haven’t watched it in years, though. Ah, nostalgia.
(And the Twilight books! I have a theory that Stephanie Meyer laced the pages with crack, thus making the stories doubly addictive.)
I’m a wheel watcher…watching it right now!
Teen Best Friend Week? They have obviously run of of themes for the weeks as well. And are they teens that are best friends or best friends that have been friends since they were teens?
regans last blog post..I’m living off the grid
OMG, how cool if they’d add a W.O.F. category dealing w/ gangsta rap tunes… You’d win millions. Laid back. “With my mind on my money, and my money on my mind…”
First time posting here – you are funny girl! I’d pay good money for a Skid Row WOF Drinking Game. New career??? OH YA BABY!
“Everybody got a cup, but they ain’t chipped in” – ya, that typa shit happens all the time.
Wheel of Fortune is wack. I watched it the other day for the first time in about 10 years. The topic was “things around the house” and the answer was “those thick plush beach towels.” WTF?
beatnikchiks last blog post..preoccupied