Kristabella: Full of Snark Since 1977

Posted By Kristabella on November 14, 2012

Last month, my lone surviving grandparent, my Gram, turned 89. We had a party for her at her house and had breakfast for dinner, something she loved. It was a great day and we all loved celebrating her long, long life.

Gram isn’t doing so well. She’s 89, it’s to be expected. A few months back, she stopped being able to use her walker and was now getting from room to room in a wheelchair. She couldn’t get up at night to use the bathroom or even reach over to the commode in her bedroom. My mom, who lives with her, would help her with all this.

My mom had a doctor’s appointment back in August in the early morning on a Saturday out in the burbs. She asked me to come over and help Gram out of bed, get her breakfast, help her do what she needed, etc. I was more than happy to.

In those few hours, just lifting her and moving her from one room to another (pre-wheelchair), I was exhausted. I didn’t know how my mom did it every day. It was too much for her to handle. I think all of us in the family knew it was probably time to start thinking about other options.

Gram had someone come to help during the day, but still a lot of it was left to my mom. I think my mom would admit the worst was getting woken up in the middle of the night when Gram had to go to the bathroom. My mom is no spring chicken. It was taking a toll.

Last week Gram was sick. Her blood pressure was sky-high and she was hallucinating. It worried my mom and my aunt. The paramedics were called and she was admitted to the hospital. After a day, her blood pressure evened out and her medication levels were normalized and they were going to discharge her.

Problem is, we knew my mom couldn’t do it anymore on her own. Gram going home was not the right place for her. After all this time, we all realized that it was time for her to go to a nursing home.

She moved in last Friday. I went to visit her on Saturday and she slept the whole time. She was so out of it. The only time she said anything was when she was yelling at the nurse, using swear words, something Gram never did.

By Sunday, my aunt had visited and said she was awake, but was super depressed and just talking about wanting to die.

In the move to the home, she hurt her leg and it was stuck in a bent position. It was causing her a lot of pain (hence the swear words) and meant that she couldn’t do much but lay in bed.

With her moving in on the weekend, with a skeleton staff, we knew it wouldn’t be until Monday until she could start physical therapy and hope to maybe get a bit stronger.

According to my mom, PT has helped her leg. She’s still weak and frail and can’t pick up the phone if we call. But we’re all hoping she gets better. Or as best as she can, since she’s 89 and has lived a long life.

This has been a really hard time for my mom and aunt. When we were younger, Gram’s brother-in-law was in a home due to dementia. He needed the care. My grandma and grandpa went to visit him often. And Gram always told us she would never go into a home. She’d rather be dead. She made us all promise we wouldn’t do that to her.

The place Gram is at is nice. All the people there are lovely. (Helps when you bring a two year old as cute as Maddie to charm the pants off everyone.) She is getting the best care.

But that doesn’t make it easier. We all know this is the right decision. She has to be in a place with 24/7 care with trained professionals. My 60-year old mom can no longer do this every night. None of us can. This isn’t what we are trained to do.

It has been so hard. It is so sad to watch your loved ones get old. I know this is what she needs, what is best for everyone, but it is still very hard to go through.

We are all banding together, making sure we can go visit her so that she’s never alone too much. It’s hard, especially with the holidays coming up. But this is what family does.

I love my Gram so much. I don’t want to think about my life without her in it, but that is childish of me to think. It is inevitable. I am so, so lucky to have had her in my life for 35 years. She has been such an important person to me and all of us. She is strong and stubborn and the best grandma anyone can ask for.

So I’m just going to enjoy her as much as I can as long as she’s still here.

 I love you Grandma Just Grandma!

Category: All in the Family, Feeeelings | 9 Comments »
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Posted By Kristabella on November 7, 2012

The theme of today’s Photo a Day thing on Instagram is reflection. Or that was yesterday’s theme. Regardless, it got me thinking about today and yesterday and, yes, politics.

I’m not an overly political person. I have become more so in my old age, which I love because I love having more knowledge about what is going on in the world and being a more-informed voter. But I would never say I’m 100% knowledgeable. I’m not sure I’m even 50% knowledgeable on all the issues. I know what issues matter to me, and I vote accordingly. I lean left, so I’m pretty much always going to vote for a Democrat.

That being said, I know plenty of Republicans and conservatives and people who do not think the way I do when it comes to the political spectrum. It is OK. That is what makes our country great. Because we can all live in this wonderful country, and not worry about being persecuted for those beliefs. We’re allowed to believe the way we do. Sadly, though, it isn’t always nice and harmonious, as many of us saw on Facebook in the last few months. (On BOTH sides.)

Four years ago today, after Barack Obama was elected the first black President of the United States, I wrote this post. And that day, I was offered a job with my previous company. I only remember this because the recruiter at said job mentioned that post while he was offering me the job. I’m pretty sure I stopped breathing for three seconds when he told me that, but then it never came up in the time I worked there.

Since that time, I bought my first house, a condo I love. I got a new job that I love that challenges me and that I never want to leave.

I don’t think this all has to do with Obama. I am better off than I was four years ago, but a lot of that is my doing. Obama was a key player in my ability to buy a condo, with his first-time buyer’s program. And I’m planning to be able to refinance my place to save some money, even though I’m underwater, due to another one of his programs.

I also am a woman and have a pre-existing condition, so I am thankful for Obamacare. I hope I won’t need it, but am so happy it is there if I ever need to get it. It isn’t perfect, but it is better than we had. I am very happy to not be paying more to go to the doctor for a physical than a man.

Am I 100% happy with the job he has done the last four years? No. Not by a long shot. But I am happy he’s getting another four years to fix what is wrong. No one could have done much with this economy in just four years. I am glad to see he will get more time to fix it and he better damn well do it.

But there was a comment on CNN last night that was so dead on. This was before the race was called. It was getting closer to looking like an Obama victory, but they pointed out the popular vote. At that point, Romney was ahead in the popular vote. And the one woman on CNN pointed that out. She said that regardless of who won, ours was a divided country and that something needed to be done about that.

THIS. This is the most important thing to come out of this election. This is what people need to be focusing on. We are a divided country, and yet a large majority of voters (on all sides) in exit polls said that things need to be changed. That isn’t a partisan belief. We ALL, as Americans, know that things need to change. Things here need to get better. We need to have more jobs, more people working and a healthy economy.

I hope this is the thing that all of our elected officials remember when they start their new session in Congress in 2013. We need to work together. This isn’t a Democrat issue; this isn’t a Republican issue. This is an American issue. And we all need to work together to get America back to where she used to be. There are too many people suffering here, in the USA, for this to keep going on like this.

Let’s stop worrying about the other party and partisanship, and let our elected officials start worrying about their constituents, the ones that got them elected. Let them start worrying about how to fix this. You represent everyone, not just the people who voted for you. Let them put this shit aside and get this country back up and running. No more name calling and finger pointing. Let’s make them do the job they were elected for. Let us all put aside petty differences and get back to helping others help themselves.

After the nastiness of this election, this is something all of us can aim to do. We all live here, let’s ALL make an effort to make it a better country, a better place for all of us, red or blue. In four years, we should all say we are better off.

Well, unless you’re Mitt Romney.

Category: Deep Thoughts, Politics | 3 Comments »
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Posted By Kristabella on November 1, 2012

I was talking to my friend Daisy yesterday, the absolutely lovely, beautiful and all-around perfect human being Daisy (she told me to say that, but she is pretty rad), and we were talking about NaBloPoMo. That’s upon us now and we were both saying how we’re not doing it this year.

I mentioned I will use November to get back into more of a habit of writing more than once a month, but wasn’t going to commit to every day. I just don’t have time for it. And it’s stupid to stress about posting on a Saturday night when I’m out having fun. Or like last year, when I’m drunk off my ass on Thanksgiving.

She encouraged me to write more. And I told her that part of the problem is laziness. (That’s actually really probably 98% of the problem.) And that generally I use the time that I should be writing to play stupid games on my phone. I am currently obsessed with solitaire. Like it is such a fascinating game to me, I can’t stop playing it.

That got me thinking about games on our phones. Yeah, I’ve gone through my Angry Birds phase, and then there was the Ranch Rush (and Ranch Rush 2!) phase. Or the Diner Dash and all the other Dash games phase. I can easily get sucked into stupid games like that on my phone and lose hours and hours of my day.

Insert segue here.

Do you guys know about Minecraft?

If you know any kids from age 6 to 12, you’ve probably heard about it. I only just recently heard about it from my nephew Noah, who is OBSESSED. In fact, when he was first explaining the game to me, I was convinced he was kidding and totally trying to punk me.

Turns out her wasn’t. This game is just that weird and stupid.

There is no point, in case you’re wondering. You can’t beat it. You don’t really have to DO anything, except stay alive. I think?

And in this day and age of such realistic graphics, it’s 8-bit and all pixely.

You basically mine materials and build shit, like houses. And you have to build a furnace to make iron. And use the iron to make a stove, so you can eat steaks. Because you have to kill cows and pigs and sheep. And I think there is sugar cane, but it doesn’t do anything? And then you have to kill zombies and creepers? It makes no sense, in a nutshell.

I watched Noah and Skyler this past weekend and they talk of nothing else. In fact, they did nothing else but play it while I was there. (Auntie lets them do whatever when she’s there. Also, Auntie may have needed a nap.)

The best part is the parody videos. If you’ve heard of the game and ever seen it, you have to watch this one:

As weird as it is, I guess I can’t really judge since I’m like 25 years older than them and doing the same thing, except with solitaire and planting crops in Ranch Rush.

Category: All in the Family, All Things Blogging, Land of Random | 9 Comments »
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Posted By Kristabella on October 29, 2012

I drive my car once a week, if that. And that is to and from the grocery store. Sometimes, like the past few weeks, I’ve driven my car out to the burbs to visit family. I fill up the gas tank once a month.

My car is from 1999. It runs just fine, but it is old and it has 160,000 miles on it. The AC doesn’t work, it’s missing a side mirror and there are so many dents on it, I’ve lost count. But that is OK. I park in a lot behind my place and I don’t care if anything happens to it because it suits my needs just fine. Recently I noticed some new dents on the passenger side of the car and I just shrugged them off.

This is why I don’t get a new car. Between not ever driving and the random dents, I’m better off with my trusty Nissan Sentra.

This past Saturday, I was going up to the burbs to babysit Skyler and Noah. I got in my car, the first time in a week, and something seemed off. I noticed the contents of the console were tossed. I figured this was like the last time this happened, and they were looking for change. They maybe got 5 pennies, since the console was cleared out of change back in Decemember the last time someone was in my car.

Oddly, I was not phased by this. The glove compartment wasn’t open and I just figured it was some punk-ass kid looking for a big score. In a car that was probably as old as he was. Eh. No biggie, I thought.

And then I noticed that there was something on the floor.

“Hmmmm,” I thought. “That is odd. Also, what the hell is that? Did the hood popper thing fall off? Is my hood going to fly up while I’m on the expressway a la Tommy Boy?”

Upon closer inspection, I realized it was the panel door to the electrical panel in my car.

First thought: Well, that’s stupid. What the fuck could they steal in there? A few fuses? HAVE AT THEM.

Second thought: HOLY SHIT. SOMEONE TRIED TO STEAL MY CAR.

And then I got in my car, tweeted about it, and then drove off to suburbia. It didn’t really hit me until like an hour later when I got to my brother’s house. And then I just kept saying, over and over, “I can’t believe someone tried to steal my car.” (Seriously. WHAT THE FUCK.)

I didn’t call the cops. Because, in case you haven’t heard, there are more important things the police need to be doing in this city. And really, they tried to steal it and weren’t successful.  What is there that they can do? I mean, my car is worth less than the hours a police person would put in on it.

I’m just glad that they didn’t break a window to get in and also that they DID NOT STEAL MY CAR. Because the insurance money would probably get me a month-long membership to Zipcar.

Category: A Day in the Life of Me, Chi-town, Transit Tales | 6 Comments »
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Posted By Kristabella on October 22, 2012

So. Hello.

I can’t even pretend I haven’t posted in almost three months. And I feel like there should be some explanation for my absence, but as always, there is not. I am just lazy and tired and, and, and, and one hundred other excuses.

Sometimes you just need a break from something. I have been doing this for six years (Friday was my 6th blogiversary, holy crap!). I had nothing else to say and I would rather spend my evenings watching crap TV. So I just let this little place on the interwebs go dormant.

I recently just thought about shutting it down. Although, I’m not sure how that works. I mean, “shutting it down” would probably mean doing exactly what I’ve done since August. Nothing. No need to make a sweeping announcement. Especially since that usually means that I would have some sort of spark the next day and want to write.

But last Friday I was talking with Sali about blogging. Because we are nerds like that. Actually, she was speaking at a session on writing and content at Blissdom Canada and we were brainstorming ideas and what to talk about, etc. Sali is really good about writing and sharing. I don’t know how she does it, since she has three kids and a dog and a house and a job. But she makes that time for herself. She was the best person to speak in that session because she gets it. She’s not monetizing or looking to be a brand ambassador, she loves writing and sharing stories about her life. And she’s really good at it.

As we were chatting, I was inspired! For the first time in a long, long time. I was like “I want to actually post on my blog! Huzzah!” And now I am. So there we go. Her session at least sparked the creativity of one person.

So now you get to hear about all my exciting whinings and ramblings yet again! Like about how I fell off the exercising bandwagon! And how I’m eating Paleo and will literally talk your ear off about how CARBS ARE THE DEVIL! And I turned 35! And my blog got hacked!

But those will have to wait until tomorrow. Because this has already exhausted me. My blogging stamina is not what it used to be.

*I have had “Return of the Mack” in my head all day because of this. And I don’t even know who The Mack is. It isn’t Mac 10. Apparently it is Mark Morrison, according to Wikipedia.

Category: A Dash of the Crazy, All Things Blogging, Land of Random | 6 Comments »
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