Posted By Kristabella on February 17, 2010
So, Lensolution Day 1 and I already just want to call it all off and crawl into bed and watch TV and play Words With Friends on my phone.
BUT! This is why I did it! This is why I chose this particular Lensolution! Because I knew it wasn’t going to be easy! I knew I would always want to choose beddy bye or Words With Friends over blogging! And that is the problem! One that needs fixing!
And thank God for small miracles and shared living!
My neighbors have a dog. It’s a big dog, or it has a big bark. He’s pretty quiet. He’ll bark if you walk past his door, but other than that, nothing too bad. I’ve never had to complain. But sometimes there is another dog in there. It is a small, yappy dog. One that barks A LOT. I imagine it barks each time it blinks. That’s how it seems. And then when little Yappy starts barking, the big dog starts barking. And then my cats lose their shit. And I pray they don’t lose their shit and/or their urine all over my condo.
I think they dogsit Yappy. He’s not here all the time. This is the second time since I’ve lived here that I remember Yappy. And it is the sameYappy. Of this I’m sure. I am thankful Yappy doesn’t live here full time.
Anyway, so tonight I’m sitting on my couch, watching the Olympics, updating Twitter, playing three-letter words in my WWF games (lazy trifectaright there) and I hear a scuffle in the hallway. I hear Yappy barking, big dog barking, man yelling and then swearing and banging. I OF COURSE run to the door to listen and peep out the peep hole to see what is going on. Unfortunately I live in a long hallway and my hole peeps to an empty wall. And the action was happening WAY at the end of the hall, out of the reach of my peeping hole. So I just kind of keep listening. Whatever is going on, it’s still raging and the yelling and barking has gotten louder.
So what do I do? I do what any sane person would do. I open the door and peer out to see what the fuck is going on. I figure if anyone asks, I shall deny my nosiness and just want to make sure no one was harmed. I look out and I see a bunch of people in the hallway, yelling. I see dogs, plural, barking. I see people I think are my neighbors.
It doesn’t look like anything more than an argument. The people across the hall seem to be really upset. But I’m not sure why. I’m sure the dude is just TIRED OF THE YAPPING! And I almost thank him for saying something on the behalf of the rest of us because SHUT UP YAPPY! But decide against it and go back inside.
Things start to calm down and I figure whatever kerfuffle that happened is now over. But then, OF COURSE, it starts back up again with the barking and the yelling! So I OF COURSE open the door and peer out to see just what the hell is going on. I don’t even care that everyone knows I am nosey and can see me peering out. I don’t even care that this is what I’m wearing from the waist down:
FISH PANTS! LEOPARD SLIPPERS! And I wasn’t even wearing a bra! PEOPLE SAW ME IN THIS! MANY PEOPLE! DOGS TOO!
Finally it dawned on me that I am indeed not invisible and I should go back to my position of snooping through the peep hole and with a glass up to the door.
And then it all broke up. And I went back to the Olympics and the meatballs I’m making for the pot luck tomorrow.
After about 20 minutes or so, I heard Yappy. And I heard talking. And I heard the neighbor girl say she wanted to apologize to the dude across the hall. So I paused the TV and snuck over to the door to watch and listen to find out the scoop!
It wasn’t that exciting. Apparently Yappy tried to bite the dude, but didn’t. Because Yappy wasn’t on a leash. And madness ensued and the dude got very frightened. And the only way for them all to communicate about all of this over the yapping dogs was to YELL! And they were sorry and girl would keep Yappy on a leash.
BUT THEN! THEN! I saw girl walking towards my door and oh shit! She was knocking on it. I had a Friends moment and thought maybe she could see me peering out. But I didn’t say “I can see you!” But, I should probably answer the door. But I should wait a few seconds and shuffle my feet so she didn’t think I was standing right by the door, yes? YES!
I answered it. She was a lovely girl. She felt very bad for causing the kerfuffle. I assured her I was only looking out the door to make sure that no one was hurt or needed help or was being attacked. It had nothing to do with curiosity. I’m pretty sure she didn’t buy it. And then she walked away to apologize to the rest of the neighbors.
Thankfully she didn’t ask to borrow a plunger.