Fear Smells Like Pepper Spray
Posted By Kristabella on November 25, 2008
Last Monday night, right before I was going to bed at the late hour of 11:30 PM, because I’m incapable of going to bed at a normal time, I heard someone yelling out on the street. I was brushing my teeth and I heard someone yell “HELP! 911!” over and over. It was late and I live on a rather peaceful street and in a nice neighborhood.
At first I figured it was some hooligans joking around like yelling FIRE in a crowded theatre. So I just Twittered about it. But as I finished up brushing I started thinking. I wanted to help, but there was no way in hell I could go out there at 11:30 at night. I didn’t know what went down on the street and I wasn’t putting myself in any danger. Plus, I wasn’t wearing a bra.
But then I started freaking out. Because if I happened to get attacked or something and yelled out for help, I would hope someone would call the police. I’ve actually thought about that before. So as I thought about calling 911, I heard sirens and they stopped on my street. And I saw an ambulance and police cars so I felt good that whoever was out there got help.
The question was, though, what happened?
I mentioned it to my mom because she reads the paper and watches the news. And also because it was SO weird for my neighborhood. People, the soon to be Chief of Staff for Barack Obama lives a few blocks from me. It isn’t a bad neighborhood in the very least. And yes, I rent.
My mom works with a guy who lives in an apartment complex further down the street, closer to the action. He wasn’t home when it happened, but he saw blood on the ground near his place the next day. BLOOD! ON THE GROUND! WHAT THE FUCK?
I searched online and found nothing. And then, last Thursday, we had a note hanging in our entryway from the apartment managers. It said that someone was attacked and robbed. And then I lost my shit.
I’m careful. I’m not stupid. I’m definitely city smart and am always aware of my surroundings. I’ve spent the last 10-plus years living on my own in big cities. But the thing that scares me the most is that there are just some things I cannot avoid. I do not have a garage. I have to walk to my door every day. And it is dark when I get home. And since I sometimes have a life, I do come home later in the evening. I can only be so careful.
Last Friday night I got home around 11:30 PM. And believe me, the time was not lost on me. I was close to tears as I was walking the half-block to my house because this crime was supposedly a robbery, which means that the person probably didn’t get what they wanted and will be back for more. Maybe they were looking for Rahm and were on the WRONG BLOCK. I HAVE NO IDEA! I am not a criminal and cannot understand crimes. Minus crimes of passion that involve kidnapping Robert Pattinson!
So now, for the first time in my life, I think I’m going to need to buy some pepper spray. The thing is, where the hell do you get pepper spray? You can’t buy that shit on the internet, can you? At Target? I mean what if the package exploded? Have you ever inhaled pepper spray? It is the WORST!
(And no, someone wasn’t using it in self-defense against me. I was a stupid freshman in college and sprayed it in some other girl’s room and was all “I wonder what it smells like?” They were not pleased and had to sleep in the lounge that night. And I just walked out, choking, and was all “see you in the AM ladies!”)
I’ve become even more aware when I’m outside. Which isn’t a bad thing. Fear can be a good thing sometimes. And I’m going to take every precaution to not put myself in a situation where this could happen. Which means maybe I’ll just spend more time on my couch drinking wine and watching television. Because I NEVER do that.
About the author
I was at a wedding reception on time when this complete stranger started lecturing me about how I HAD to a book called The Gift of Fear. And if I didn’t read it I would be gang raped and left for dead. Yay, that was a fun wedding reception.
I’ve never bought pepper spray, it’s always been gifted to me. I would bet WalMart has it. If not, maybe a police supply store.
regans last blog post..yay for overpriced stuff!
Scary. Take care of yourself. I think you can get pepper spray at fine places like Walmart or Target.
Coreys last blog post..Warm Wednesday 11-19-2008
Also, I should read The Gift of Proofreading since my other comment is barely understandable.
regans last blog post..yay for overpriced stuff!
I read your post in my feed reader and clicked over to recommend you read The Gift of Fear, and then I saw Regan’s comment and laughed. But, seriously, it’s a great book and I swear I wasn’t the person who lectured her at a wedding reception! It’s by Gavin DeBecker, and I still say it’s good reading for everyone. My old boss/good friend in NYC bought it for me right after my apartment got broken into and I was in…an interesting mindset (which I’ll blog about someday). It not only helped me through that time but I still find myself, 10 years later, calling on what I learned from that book.
Besides all of that, I’m so sorry that happened so close to home! It’s unsettling and I totally understand how you’re feeling. Take care of you, lady.
Jules
House of Jules
HouseofJuless last blog post..Flavor of the day
I think you need to find a healthy balance of fear. Of course you should be mindful of where you are (and that pepper spray sounds like a good idea). But don’t let that fear keep you from going out at night, etc. Because what’s the point of protecting your life if you don’t get to enjoy it? I struggled with this after I was mugged, and even had trouble staying home by myself. When I finally realized that I was better off not avoiding anything that might remotely be dangerous, I was a much happier person.
tutugirl1345s last blog post..Would you speak up?
Yikes! Be careful. I agree that it needs to be a balance though…still do you, just take some precautions.
Pepper spray: wal-mart, academy, a gun shop or even army surplus stores (at least here anyway).
Whatever you get, make sure you know how to use it, under what circumstances and be prepared to either run like crazy or fight. And since I dont see you as the track star, you better know how to fight. Since you use that shit, you will have one pissed off person on your hands.
Have a great thanksgiving, and dont get paranoid, hell, your life has enough drama to worry about getting mugged.
LarryLillys last blog post..Great, now I am being told I am a woman
I’m searching for pepper spray as soon as I finish this. You used to be able to buy it at Walmart. I also just finished a book that mentions bear spray…hey, if there’s a spray the paralyzes a grizzly, it should work on the thugs in Chicago.
Wow, that is crazy! I thought Obama lived in Hyde Park?
Okay…now you have scared the shit out of me. I was feeling so safe and peaceful in our little neighborhood. I hope they don’t come back for more and I definitely hope they weren’t looking for Rahm (that’s a little too close for comfort). While I’m in Ohio I’m going to look for one of those things you put on your keychain that you can clobber somebody with. If I find one, I’ll get you one too!
The last couple of months I lived in Bucktown were when they couldn’t catch the serial rapist. (Do you remember that guy? The one in Bucktown/Lincoln Park?) Ugh, I was so freaked out. Don’t worry- you’re a smart girl…but buy the pepper spray.
whoorls last blog post..Thanksgiving Menu and Stalking Plans
At the Gun Show (yes, I said Gun Show) they had this thing called The Black Cat. It is a keychain that allows you to put your fingers in the “cat” eyes and the ears are pointy so you can stick someone with them. The new advanced technology has groves on the ears so you can get a sample your assailant’s DNA. If there is no gun show coming to town, you can find them online:
http://www.kansasccw.org/black-cat-self-defense-keychain
thecoconutdiariess last blog post..The Blackest White
If you can’t get pepper spray at WM, I think you can get it at a gun store.
ballerinatoess last blog post..Skull Tag
I live a 3 minutes walk from my boyfriend’s apartment, but half of that is in his alley, and when it’s dark at 9 pm, it’s still scary. Not to mention when I get home at times like 1:30 am. If you find some pepper spray, would you mind posting or twittering where? I’m planning on getting some for myself as well.
Amys last blog post..In a Bit of a Pickle
Yikes! Take care of yourself and be careful. I haven’t bought pepper spray since college, but at that time I bought it at Wal-mart.
Hopefully this is an isolated incident and doesn’t become the norm in your neighborhood.
Oh Jesus. After living in NYC, I’ve still never owned pepper spray…and like you, I would have NO clue where to find it! What aisle would it even be in? I mean Target doesn’t have a self defense/weapons section, does it???
Camels & Chocolates last blog post..Hangin’ Ten
oh my goodness that is frightening! My brother’s bought me pepper spray(I’m not sure where I got it) but I am always scared that I will go to grab my cell phone out of my purse and accidently spray myself in the face
sensibly sassys last blog post..Lights, Camera, Action!
Okay, I’m dumb and can’t read. Sorry!
Pepper spray might not always be there when you need it. One thing you can do is make eye contact with people that you pass. Usually, once a robber has felt marked, the robber will move on to an easier target.
Noelles last blog post..Being Thankful
I’m not sure what your state laws are on pepper spray. If it’s legal to carry, you can usually find it at Walmart back in the gun/sporting goods area. You can also get it online. I carry a small canister that attaches to my key ring.
Another great tip is to keep a key from your key ring fixed between a couple fingers because if someone should grab you it makes a great weapon to scratch or poke them in the face with.
Other than that, just be observant of your surroundings and keep your cell handy. You might also check with your local YMCA or police department to find out about some self-defense classes for women in your area.
You know I take all these precautions seriously! I hope that incident near your place was some stupid random incident, but it’s a good reminder to all women to be vigilent when they’re out alone, especially at night.
Giggle Pixies last blog post..The Winds of Fate
Years ago when I lived in Old Town there were a series of rapes on the blocks next to me. One night at 11:30 pm I remembered I needed something out of my car (what was it? can’t remember). I put on my running shoes and ran to the car, looking behind me the whole way, got whatever it was and then ran back to my apt. I am not a runner. But I was safe.
(no idea why I decided to share that)
Our local government building was selling “the spray” at one time. If yours doesn’t have it there for purchase, I’m pretty sure they can point you in the direction of where to get it.
The Over-Thinkers last blog post..I have a new nickname. Not a cool one.
Please be as careful as you can… If you have trouble locating some spray, lemme know. I got hooked up (also while at ASU) by my big bro. He mailed me the kind that clips onto your keychain. Never needed to use it but always felt big bro there to protect me.
Take a self defense class, too.
Rees last blog post..“WTF? Move your knee!”
I know that if I ever had pepper spray, I’d end up seriously injuring myself.
Rhis last blog post..Out with the old, in with the new
I think a healthy amount of fear is a good thing. When the fear takes over your life, that’s when the balance needs to be adjusted. Be cautious and confident, from what I’ve heard they go after those they don’t expect much of a fight from.
To bad McPhee doesn’t sell bacon flavored pepper spray…I’d be sure to send you a can! 🙂
I know a gun shop or a field and track kind of a place would probably be a good place to pick up pepper spray…or you could probably even buy it online.
Just remember should anyone approach you the eyes and the groin…those are the two places to aim for.
Melissas last blog post..Ding!!!
Oh wow, that’s scary. And I have no idea where to buy pepper spray, but it sounds like it might help you feel safer, so I’d go for it.
Ambers last blog post..Forever Amber: the Early Years. Part 3 – “Pants”
i SO could never live alone. i’m such a wuss.
alis last blog post..broken limbs and apple-themed decor
I always run with pepper spray and always will. If I lived in a bigger city that shit would be in my purse 24-7. Better safe and peppery than not.
Happy! (almost) Thanksgiving, babe.
Jesus. Larry Lilly. Like seriously. Why are you so mean to her?
Anyway, given my recent run-ins with lunatic pedestrians, I am insanely paranoid. I wasn’t kidding about the PTSD.
slynnros last blog post..Ask Sassy Kay: Volume Two
Oh geez. I know Rahm lives in Ravenswood, and I live in Albany Park – that’s a little too close for comfort for me, too. 🙁 I am way too complacent about walking around in the dark listening to my iPod and not paying attention. Thanks for the reminder.
martys last blog post..I wanna do bad things with you*
When I was in Vancouver, my MOM mailed me Pepper Spray.
I’ll mail you some. Seriously. (Because I’m being all Mom-like)
Angellas last blog post..Playing With Poladroid
Be careful! You are always supposed to yell “Fire! Fire! Fire!” That way people that aren’t involved will call for help because they are looking out for themselves. You are never supposed to yell just help. Keep it in mind.
I used to carry pepper spray on my key chain in college because I walked everywhere. I’ve gotten out of the habit for the stupidest reason: it was weighing down my purse.
Oy. Off to buy a new one.
Pretty much any outdoors/sporting goods store will have pepper spray because it is a “must purchase” for campers. Even if that store doesn’t carry the spray, they will be able to tell you where to buy it!
You should also invest in a rape whistle or some kind of noise maker that makes a REALLY loud (and irritating) noise–something that can be activated by pushing a button is good (if you get the wind knocked out of you a whistle won’t be very helpful). So many people hear “help” or “fire” and think “oh that’s just some punks fooling around” but you can be sure that EVERYONE in the vicinity will look for the source of a loud and annoying sound!
If you want to be truly paranoid, you can carry your cell phone in your hand with 9-1 already dialed. I used to do that (I lived very close to a bad neighborhood and didn’t get off of work until almost midnight).
Erins last blog post..Thanksgiving
Sorry it took such a scary little incident to create this hilarity– I love your style!
I’m going to add you to my reader before I forget again.
LiteralDans last blog post..Classic quotes, Vol. 9