General Maladies

Posted By on November 11, 2011

I ended up calling the doctor and talking to the pharmacist about my impending antibiotics dose. My doctor said that while C Diff does indeed suck, a mouth infection is also not good. So she suggested that I take probiotics. The pharmacist was not much help at all and wasn’t exactly sure what C Diff was and then was all “oh, you don’t usually get that more than once.” Which is the opposite of everything else I’ve read about it.

So I chose to believe her! Of course I did!

I started probiotics a few days ago. And I started the antibiotics this morning. I’m hoping it all works out and there are no poop-splosions in my near future. But, on a good note, I know what the symptoms are, in case I do have a repeat occurrence, and then I will stop taking the medicine. As opposed to the last time, when I just kept taking medicine that was making my ass feel like it was on fire.


Anyway, I bring this up because today I started two medicines in advance of the oral surgery. I picked them up at the drug store near my office this morning because when I went to pick them up yesterday, I realized I left my wallet at home. Good thing I bring my lunch!

The two things were not in a small white paper bag like normal prescriptions. They were in a LARGE brown paper bag. I’m pretty sure everyone that saw me leaving CVS this morning thought I was carrying an enema in the bag. Or 20 pregnancy tests.

But no! It was just a large bottle of pills and a GINORMOUS bottle of anti-bacterial mouthwash.

I started both these medicines this morning. The antibiotic is straight forward. The only thing that worried me was a) the chance of the poop issues, of course, and b) that it specifically says that if heartburn is one of the side effects, to contact your doctor immediately. Like it’s considered a SERIOUS side effect, where poop-splosions are just regular, run-of-the-mill side effects.

Well. Hmmm. That’s not good. Because I GET HEARTBURN EVERY DAY.

How do you know the difference? AM I GOING TO DIE?

The mouth rinse is also stupid. I have to do it twice a day, preferably once in the morning and once before bed. The problem with this is that I cannot eat or drink for two hours once I rinse. That’s fine at night when I’m drooling on my pillow. Not so fine in the morning when I’m hungry and thirsty and ITCHING for the caffeine from my coffee to be racing through my veins.

Oh! And it leaves a nasty taste in your mouth! So even water tastes gross! And food! So! At least it should work wonders on my too-tight pants!

As long as it doesn’t lead to the Kristin Johnsons, I’m calling it a huge victory.

About the author

Kristabella, who also answers to “Hey! Drunk Girl!”, is a reformed band geek with an amazing ability to drink most people under the table. You can read her inane ramblings here, where she talks about her exciting life as a spinster with two cats and a fascination for Bacon.


5 Responses to “General Maladies”

  1. Christa says:

    This seems like a good time to show you an article I wrote almost a year ago:
    Christa´s last blog post ..Funny porn for smart people …

  2. Here’s hoping you don’t get the Kristen Johnsons – I think I read somewhere once that that shit stinks. 😉 Eat your yogurt, and take lots of probiotics. I too am prone to all that fun stuff. We’re so lucky, huh?

  3. Angella says:

    Hoping that they are working and NOT giving you the KJ’s. 🙂
    Angella´s last blog post ..Sunday Mornings

  4. Cass says:

    Crossing my fingers you don’t get c diff, I had it earlier this year & it was probably the sickest I’ve been in many years. Ended up in the ER and all that. 🙁 But the probiotics and the yogurt should help you out a little bit.

    Also if you’re on the meds I think you are it doesn’t let you have alcohol. Here’s hoping it’s not.
    Cass´s last blog post ..Ten on Tuesday: Pasta Edition

  5. Denise says:

    tip to get rid of hearburn: 1 tsp of L-Glutamine powder in 8oz of water 3x per day until you can get down to 1x per day. Vitamin World has a great one, low cost + effective. Much cheaper than Rx and has added health benefits. When I got the advice from my Dr at $200 per visit, I said I really wished a friend had told me about this first.
    You are hillarious. love your posts.