Kristabella: Full of Snark Since 1977

Posted By Kristabella on January 7, 2013

Happy New Year! I have been completely absent from here. I was all “oh, my Gram died.” And then no follow-up until “hey, I’m shilling hair products for BlogHer!” So, I’m doing just fine, if you could guess.

So it’s a new year, which means it is time for resolutions and all that good stuff. I, for one, have made one to eat better and exercise more. Which I’m pretty sure is what I say every year. But this year, especially, I feel like I went way overboard with unhealthy eating from Thanksgiving to New Year’s. Like not a semi-normal, few treats here, few treats there, holiday-eating-in-excess-on-the-actual-holiday kind of thing. Nope, I went balls to the wall for like 2 months, eating anything and everything, enough to have my pants really not fit at all.

So in a fit of crying over tight pants and complete lethargy, I decided that I would do the Whole 30 in January. I’ve been debating it for a few months, but there was no way I was going to do that to myself over any holiday.

The plan was to start on January 2. Because I’m a realist and knew I would spend all day on New Year’s Day hungover and in bed. Which was the case because I was out until like 5 AM on NYE. This coming off a drunken binge on Sunday after watching football and drinking for like 7 hours straight and NOT eating. At 3 PM on NYE, I was convinced I wasn’t even going to drink that night. That went out the window, clearly.

And because of the early morning shenanigans (late night NYE dance party, FTW!), I did nothing on January 1. Well, not completely true. I napped. And I think I ate some food. And then I took another nap. And I even went grocery shopping. But that was the extent. Whole 30 was going to have to start on the 3rd, because I am a degenerate.

If you aren’t aware of what the Whole 30 is, it’s basically what I call a super strict, squeaky clean version of Paleo. On crack. You can read more here. I’ve read the book It Starts With Food and it was really eye-opening. I figured you could scoff at their research, but until you did the Whole 30 you can’t really judge. I am a huge emotional eater. I crave sugar all the time. I have wicked swings in hunger and crazy drops in my blood sugar level. (Crazy enough that I’ve almost passed out several times. This is not normal.) So I wanted to take on this clean eating and learn about the response I have to putting things (or not putting things) into my body.

The biggest challenge is not only sugar, but also booze. Because I am a 35 year old singleton and I would like to have some semblance of a social life. And that pretty much involves drinking. So 30 days without a drop of alcohol might very well kill me. Which is probably another problem all in itself.

Today was Day 5. It isn’t so bad. I’m thankful that I was doing a Paleo kind of diet in the last five or so months so at least I know that I will feel like shit. For all the crap I ate during the holidays, I’m surprised I haven’t felt worse. So far I’m just kind of tired at times. And I really want some ice cream after dinner. Damn you, Sugar Dragon!

On Saturday, I went out to see a show as part of Chicago Sketchfest. After that, we went to a bar down the street. I stayed out from 9 PM to 2 AM drinking nothing but water and club soda. It was not the worst thing in the world. I actually had fun. Also, people are really hard to understand when they are slurring at 2 AM. Is it something I can keep doing for the next 25 days? Yes. Is it something I want to keep up after Day 30? Hell no.

It was so nice to wake up Sunday without a hangover and be productive, though.

I don’t think I’m going to chronicle much of it here, since I’d imagine most people find that boring. But I am excited to let you know how it is all going and especially to hopefully share some good thoughts about it at the end of the 30 days. You know, once I get back from my week-long sugar and booze bender.

Category: A Day in the Life of Me, Healthy Living, Mmmm Food | 8 Comments »
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Posted By Kristabella on December 17, 2012

It’s no secret that I color my hair. In fact, in the six years I’ve been writing on this blog, I think I’ve gone from blonde to brown to blonde back to brown again. Right now it is brown and I think it is the closest I’ve ever been to my natural color since high school. High school being the time before I started coloring my hair.

I haven’t been to the salon in a LONG time. My stylist up and had a baby and I’ve been looking for a new one in the City. I have a few names, but this time of year I’m so busy, I haven’t had time to actually make an appointment. At this rate, my stylist will be back from maternity leave and I’ll have to make an appointment due to my faded, dull hair that has grown to Rapunzel lengths.

So my stylist used to work at a salon. Now she’s on her own. The thing about this that pisses me off is that she doesn’t have a salon full of hair products that I can buy and be reminded to buy every time I get my hair done. Which means I’m left to my own devices when it comes to buying shampoo and conditioner.

And here is where the problem starts – I am lazy and I shop for hair products at the grocery store. Do you know what that means? It means my color lasts like 2 weeks and my hair looks like crap. Especially now that it is winter and DRY, DRY, DRY. Because I buy crap shampoo and conditioner from the grocery store.

There is a reason the saying “you get what you pay for” exists. Because sometimes it is necessary to buy higher-end shampoo and conditioner so that you can protect the investment of coloring/dyeing on your hair.

Enter Fekkai and their Salon Technician Color Care™ collection. This is the perfect thing to not only protect your color from the elements and crappy shampoo, but also a way to keep your hair healthy through all the damage we put it through with blow dryers, curling irons and flat irons.

The best part is you can shop all the Fekkai Collections online. And just in time for the holidays, order online here and get 10% off your total order and a complimentary headband with a purchase of $50 or more (while supplies last). Just enter Promo Code: HEADBAND when you check out.

 

Category: All Things Blogging, Sponsored | 1 Comment »
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Posted By Kristabella on November 26, 2012

Today we said goodbye to my Gram for the final time. We laid her to rest and she is now up in heaven with her husband, my Papa, and a lot of her loved ones.

For those of you who don’t follow me on Twitter, she passed away on Wednesday night. My mom called me on Wednesday morning to let me know that Gram had taken a turn for the worse. Her body shut down and she was in a coma. Not knowing how long she would last, I tried to decided if I wanted to try and see her in the morning on Thursday, or leave my last memory of her as the one from the Saturday prior, when she was awake and asking me about my love life.

I didn’t need to decide. By that evening, she was gone. My mom and aunt were in her room at the nursing home earlier in the day and had said their goodbyes. My mom said Gram looked so peaceful and calm. For so long she had been in so much pain that she was always so clenched up. I am glad she didn’t suffer and that she finally let go.

Little did we know, Gram planned for all of this. She had a letter to my mom and my aunt, marked that they couldn’t read until she died. It had instructions on how she wanted her funeral to be handled. And she made sure to point out that we should all look nice and get dressed up, even if we had to use her money to buy clothes for all the kids.

She also wrote a letter to each of the grandchildren. It was done quite some time ago, since it was back when I was in California. But it is something I will absolutely cherish for the rest of my life. All you parents out there, you should plan to do this. It helped me so much with closure and it was just nice, one last time, to hear from Gram.

My Gram was an amazing person. I got my stubborn streak from her and I learned from her to speak my mind. She survived the Depression. She raised two kids as a working mother. Some of my best memories as a child is of the weekends when Grandma and Papa came over to visit. They would bring us Dunkin Donuts and then we’d always go out to eat at Denny’s.

When my parents got divorced, it was hard, financially, on my mom. My grandparents took us in. We lived there and they always made sure, for the rest of our lives, that we always had clothes on our backs and food on the table. None of us, me, my brother or my sister, would be where we were without my Gram. I don’t think I ever really thanked her for that. I hope she knew.

I think that in some way, Gram planned this to happen before Thanksgiving. We were all stressing, worrying about how to get her home to celebrate with us, or how we could celebrate with her. And I think, as far as these things go, it happened at the right time. We had to all be together on Thanksgiving anyway, and it was exactly what we needed to remember Gram and her life and how important she was to all of us.

She had deteriorated so much in the last few years, especially in the last few months. But the way she looked today, was like Gram of 5 years ago. And she looked so peaceful and, oddly, full of life. It was a wonderful last image for all of us to have of her.

Gram, I will miss you more than I can ever say. You have meant to much to me and you have made me such a strong person. I hope you’re up in heaven with Papa, happily reunited (and not annoying him too much) and proud of the amazing daughters, grandchildren and great grandchildren you have loved as much as we loved you.

Rest in peace.

Miss Me But Let Me Go

Author: Anonymous

When I come to the end of the road

And the sun has set for me

I want to rites in a gloom-filled room

Why cry for a soul set free?

 

Miss me a little-but not too long

And not with your head bowed low

Remember the love that we once shared

Miss me-but let me go

 

For this is a journey that we all must take

And each must go alone.

It’s all part of the Master’s plan

A step on the road to home

 

When you are lonely and sick of heart

Go to the friends we know

And bury your sorrows in doing good deeds

Miss me but let me go.

Category: All in the Family, Feeeelings | 23 Comments »
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Posted By Kristabella on November 14, 2012

Last month, my lone surviving grandparent, my Gram, turned 89. We had a party for her at her house and had breakfast for dinner, something she loved. It was a great day and we all loved celebrating her long, long life.

Gram isn’t doing so well. She’s 89, it’s to be expected. A few months back, she stopped being able to use her walker and was now getting from room to room in a wheelchair. She couldn’t get up at night to use the bathroom or even reach over to the commode in her bedroom. My mom, who lives with her, would help her with all this.

My mom had a doctor’s appointment back in August in the early morning on a Saturday out in the burbs. She asked me to come over and help Gram out of bed, get her breakfast, help her do what she needed, etc. I was more than happy to.

In those few hours, just lifting her and moving her from one room to another (pre-wheelchair), I was exhausted. I didn’t know how my mom did it every day. It was too much for her to handle. I think all of us in the family knew it was probably time to start thinking about other options.

Gram had someone come to help during the day, but still a lot of it was left to my mom. I think my mom would admit the worst was getting woken up in the middle of the night when Gram had to go to the bathroom. My mom is no spring chicken. It was taking a toll.

Last week Gram was sick. Her blood pressure was sky-high and she was hallucinating. It worried my mom and my aunt. The paramedics were called and she was admitted to the hospital. After a day, her blood pressure evened out and her medication levels were normalized and they were going to discharge her.

Problem is, we knew my mom couldn’t do it anymore on her own. Gram going home was not the right place for her. After all this time, we all realized that it was time for her to go to a nursing home.

She moved in last Friday. I went to visit her on Saturday and she slept the whole time. She was so out of it. The only time she said anything was when she was yelling at the nurse, using swear words, something Gram never did.

By Sunday, my aunt had visited and said she was awake, but was super depressed and just talking about wanting to die.

In the move to the home, she hurt her leg and it was stuck in a bent position. It was causing her a lot of pain (hence the swear words) and meant that she couldn’t do much but lay in bed.

With her moving in on the weekend, with a skeleton staff, we knew it wouldn’t be until Monday until she could start physical therapy and hope to maybe get a bit stronger.

According to my mom, PT has helped her leg. She’s still weak and frail and can’t pick up the phone if we call. But we’re all hoping she gets better. Or as best as she can, since she’s 89 and has lived a long life.

This has been a really hard time for my mom and aunt. When we were younger, Gram’s brother-in-law was in a home due to dementia. He needed the care. My grandma and grandpa went to visit him often. And Gram always told us she would never go into a home. She’d rather be dead. She made us all promise we wouldn’t do that to her.

The place Gram is at is nice. All the people there are lovely. (Helps when you bring a two year old as cute as Maddie to charm the pants off everyone.) She is getting the best care.

But that doesn’t make it easier. We all know this is the right decision. She has to be in a place with 24/7 care with trained professionals. My 60-year old mom can no longer do this every night. None of us can. This isn’t what we are trained to do.

It has been so hard. It is so sad to watch your loved ones get old. I know this is what she needs, what is best for everyone, but it is still very hard to go through.

We are all banding together, making sure we can go visit her so that she’s never alone too much. It’s hard, especially with the holidays coming up. But this is what family does.

I love my Gram so much. I don’t want to think about my life without her in it, but that is childish of me to think. It is inevitable. I am so, so lucky to have had her in my life for 35 years. She has been such an important person to me and all of us. She is strong and stubborn and the best grandma anyone can ask for.

So I’m just going to enjoy her as much as I can as long as she’s still here.

 I love you Grandma Just Grandma!

Category: All in the Family, Feeeelings | 9 Comments »
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Posted By Kristabella on November 7, 2012

The theme of today’s Photo a Day thing on Instagram is reflection. Or that was yesterday’s theme. Regardless, it got me thinking about today and yesterday and, yes, politics.

I’m not an overly political person. I have become more so in my old age, which I love because I love having more knowledge about what is going on in the world and being a more-informed voter. But I would never say I’m 100% knowledgeable. I’m not sure I’m even 50% knowledgeable on all the issues. I know what issues matter to me, and I vote accordingly. I lean left, so I’m pretty much always going to vote for a Democrat.

That being said, I know plenty of Republicans and conservatives and people who do not think the way I do when it comes to the political spectrum. It is OK. That is what makes our country great. Because we can all live in this wonderful country, and not worry about being persecuted for those beliefs. We’re allowed to believe the way we do. Sadly, though, it isn’t always nice and harmonious, as many of us saw on Facebook in the last few months. (On BOTH sides.)

Four years ago today, after Barack Obama was elected the first black President of the United States, I wrote this post. And that day, I was offered a job with my previous company. I only remember this because the recruiter at said job mentioned that post while he was offering me the job. I’m pretty sure I stopped breathing for three seconds when he told me that, but then it never came up in the time I worked there.

Since that time, I bought my first house, a condo I love. I got a new job that I love that challenges me and that I never want to leave.

I don’t think this all has to do with Obama. I am better off than I was four years ago, but a lot of that is my doing. Obama was a key player in my ability to buy a condo, with his first-time buyer’s program. And I’m planning to be able to refinance my place to save some money, even though I’m underwater, due to another one of his programs.

I also am a woman and have a pre-existing condition, so I am thankful for Obamacare. I hope I won’t need it, but am so happy it is there if I ever need to get it. It isn’t perfect, but it is better than we had. I am very happy to not be paying more to go to the doctor for a physical than a man.

Am I 100% happy with the job he has done the last four years? No. Not by a long shot. But I am happy he’s getting another four years to fix what is wrong. No one could have done much with this economy in just four years. I am glad to see he will get more time to fix it and he better damn well do it.

But there was a comment on CNN last night that was so dead on. This was before the race was called. It was getting closer to looking like an Obama victory, but they pointed out the popular vote. At that point, Romney was ahead in the popular vote. And the one woman on CNN pointed that out. She said that regardless of who won, ours was a divided country and that something needed to be done about that.

THIS. This is the most important thing to come out of this election. This is what people need to be focusing on. We are a divided country, and yet a large majority of voters (on all sides) in exit polls said that things need to be changed. That isn’t a partisan belief. We ALL, as Americans, know that things need to change. Things here need to get better. We need to have more jobs, more people working and a healthy economy.

I hope this is the thing that all of our elected officials remember when they start their new session in Congress in 2013. We need to work together. This isn’t a Democrat issue; this isn’t a Republican issue. This is an American issue. And we all need to work together to get America back to where she used to be. There are too many people suffering here, in the USA, for this to keep going on like this.

Let’s stop worrying about the other party and partisanship, and let our elected officials start worrying about their constituents, the ones that got them elected. Let them start worrying about how to fix this. You represent everyone, not just the people who voted for you. Let them put this shit aside and get this country back up and running. No more name calling and finger pointing. Let’s make them do the job they were elected for. Let us all put aside petty differences and get back to helping others help themselves.

After the nastiness of this election, this is something all of us can aim to do. We all live here, let’s ALL make an effort to make it a better country, a better place for all of us, red or blue. In four years, we should all say we are better off.

Well, unless you’re Mitt Romney.

Category: Deep Thoughts, Politics | 3 Comments »
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