DINAO Round 12 – The Judges Edition

Posted By on July 21, 2009

Hey! Do you know what we haven’t done in awhile? DEATH IS NOT AN OPTION!

I just looked in my archives and the last time I did one of these was in October. That is far too long to go with thinking about disgusting people to sleep with. Plus my mom keeps harassing me to do one. She is disappointed every day when it is not DINAO. And I’m pretty sure half the people that now read my blog have NO idea what I’m talking about.

The object of the game is when given the choice of two people below, you have to pick which of the two you would rather have sex with. The fun part being that death is not an option and you have to pick one! Believe me, sometimes death is the only option. You can see all the other rounds here.

Without further ado, in honor of our new Supreme Court Justice, I give you…

Round 12 – The Famous Judges Edition

The TV Judge Edition

Judge Wapner vs. Judge Joe Brown

TPC_wapner Brown-Joe

The Old Lady Judge Edition

Judge Judy vs. Judge Ruth Bader Ginsburg

judge-judy ruth_bader_ginsburg

The Supreme Court Ladies Edition

Judge Sonia Sotomayor vs. Judge Sandra Day O’Connor

sonia_sotomayor_judge sandra_day_oconnor

The I-Don’t-Even-Know-Who-These-Judges-Are Edition

AKA The Chocolate vs. Vanilla Edition

Judge Greg Mathis vs. Judge Mills Lane

mathis judgemillslane

The African American Edition

Thurgood Marshall vs. Clarence Thomas

Thurgood_Marshall Clarence_Thomas_official

The Reality TV Judge Edition

Simon  Cowell vs. Tom Colicchio

simoncowell108 colicchio2

There you have it! Leave your votes in the comments!

Remember, death is NOT an option. If you choose death, you will be asked to leave Kristabellikstan to never return or be required to have sex with Larry King. Your choice. Remember there is FREE BOOZE AND CUPCAKES in Kristabellikstan. Choose wisely.

About the author

Kristabella, who also answers to “Hey! Drunk Girl!”, is a reformed band geek with an amazing ability to drink most people under the table. You can read her inane ramblings here, where she talks about her exciting life as a spinster with two cats and a fascination for Bacon.


25 Responses to “DINAO Round 12 – The Judges Edition”

  1. Jessica says:

    This is my first time participating in DINAO. So here goes:

    1. Judge Wapner just because I think Dustin Hoffman from RAINMAN would want me to.

    2. Judge Judy – because I think she’d be great at giving direction (or barking orders).

    3. Sandra Day O’Conner only because I’d have bragging rights – “Hey, I did the first woman Supreme Court justice.”

    4. Chocolate vs. vanilla is a tough one b/c like you, I have no idea who either one of them is (pardon the bad grammar) so I’m going to request a threesome on that one.

    5. Clarence Thomas – because I’ve never slept with a Republican. (Oh, I couldn’t even type that with a straight face.)

    6. The last one is a no brainer. I’ve been dying to do Simon Cowell since season 2.

    Thanks for the activity. Good times!
    .-= Jessica´s last blog ..My New J.O.B. =-.

  2. Yv- says:

    Colicchio is hot. No deathly option needed. Have you seen the way that man deals with the kitchen? RAWR!

  3. Mahnee says:

    YAY!!!!! But JUDGES…or as Cat Deeley on So You Think You Can Dance says “jidges”

    1. Wapner….oldie but goodie
    2. Judy cus I don’t think Ruth has sex…ain’t she prim & proper looking?
    3. Sonia…no reason
    4. Greg Mathis cuz the other guy looks mean
    5. Thurgood…wasn’t Clarence deeply embroiled in controversy when he was nominated? About sexual harassment? I’d have to Google to be sure but he’s just struck me as sleazy since then.
    6. SIMON!!!!! Hell, no contest!!!!

    Thank you Kristabella!!!!! Mommy loves her DINAO first thing in the AM!!!!!

  4. pseudostoops says:


    1. Wapner
    2. Judy (but that’s just because I love Ruth, and fear sex might break her at this delicate point in her life. She’s been ill, after all.)
    3. Sotomayor
    4. Mathis
    5. Marshall. Oh god, thinking about Thomas and sex still gives me the heebs more than fifteen years after his confirmation.
    6. Lane
    7. Colicchio.
    .-= pseudostoops´s last blog ..Fitness Foibles: 10K Edition (Plus BlogHer snacks) =-.

  5. Missy says:

    Are you SURE death is not an option? Here goes…
    1. Judge Joe Brown. Because with Wapner I’d only be able to think of Rain Man. “It’s time for Wapner. 4 o’clock. Time for Wapner…”

    2. Ginsburg. At leaset she wouldn’t yell at me.

    3. Sotomayor seems like she’d bring the romance a bit more than O’Connor. So Sotomayor wins.

    4. Can I have a tie? I’d go for either of them, for real.

    5. Thurgood Marshall. Always go with the original.

    6. Colicchio, pretty, pretty pretty please!!
    .-= Missy´s last blog ..Changing Tack =-.

  6. Candy says:

    Your mom just cracked me up.

    OK…it’s been a while since I participated in one of these!!

    1. Joe Brown. I’m pretty sure he knows how to treat a lady.
    2. Judy. I’m pretty sure she knows how to treat a lady.
    3. Sandra Day – because she was once a cowgirl. If you get my drift.
    4. Greg Mathis, even though I don’t know who he is, because he looks like he knows just what to do with that gavel.
    5. Thurgood because when I see Clarence Thomas I think pubic hair.
    6. And finally, Simon. Ooooh baby, be still my heart.
    .-= Candy´s last blog ..Dr. Celebrity Weighs In =-.

  7. mouncie123 says:

    I have missed DINAO!
    My responce ALL EWWWWWW!

  8. mouncie123 says:

    sorry for spelling error – happy fingers

  9. Mollywood says:

    HOORAY!!!! Oh, how I love and have missed DINAO!

    (1) Wapner – Classic and sadly I had a crush on him in elementary school.
    (2) Ginsburg – So smart. So unfazed by fashion.
    (3) Sandra Day O’Connor – She’s been my role model for a long time!
    (4) I choose death – free booze and cupcakes please.
    (5) Clarence Thomas
    (6) Tom Colicchio is sooooooo hot! And he would cook yummy food post-coitus for Mollywood!

  10. tmc says:

    Gross! But here goes:

    Judge Joe Brown because he says he’s from the “mean streets” and I’d like to make fun of him about that.
    Judge Ruth Bader Ginsberg because I think she had cancer at some point and might have some pretty good drugs leftover in her medicine cabinet.
    Judge Sonia Sotomayor because I think she’s got more oomph than SDC.
    Judge Mills Lane because he’s crazy and I’d like to hear what kinds of weird southern witticisms he’d toss at me.
    Judge Thurgood Marshall – See Ruth Bader Ginsberg entry. Also, I think he’d have a kick-ass library in his house from which I could pilfer books and he’d never notice.
    Tom Colicchio – I don’t know him but based on his outfit I’m guessing he’s a chef and I’d like to run amok in his professional kitchen. I’m sure he has a mandolin! I’m dying to try a real, quality mandolin.
    .-= tmc´s last blog ..Just about back to normal =-.

  11. Deb says:

    The Marshall/Thomas non-choice has me considering leaving Kristabellikstan for good. I’ll find my alcohol elsewhere. Right now I need to take an ativan and go lay down. Because, Jesus Christ, Thurgood Marshall? How about I do Ginsburg twice?


    1. Wapner – because I’m old skool
    2. Ginsburg – Judy is SCARY
    3. Sotomayor
    4. Mathis
    5. Marshall – Thur is good.
    6. Cowell
    .-= C @ Kid Things´s last blog ..Have You Met Ralph? =-.

  13. Rhi says:

    Anyone who picks Simon Cowell over my Tom should be forced to leave Kristabellikstan.
    .-= Rhi´s last blog ..Friday Bullets: Live Performance Edition =-.

  14. paperdiva says:

    hilarious. And obscure!
    I laughed at all the previous answers, and can’t come up with anything funnier!

  15. Darcey says:

    1. Wapner – though I am afraid I might break his hip.
    2. Judy – yeah, Ruth just looks too delicate.
    3. Sotomayor – Hey, if Obama thinks she’s good enough…
    4. Mills Lane – Wasn’t he the boxing ref that was mocked on MTV’s Celebrity Death Match? The one that said, “Let’s get it on”?
    5. Marshall – Thomas is skeezy.
    6. Colicchio – even if Death WERE an option.

  16. christina says:

    Or you can look at it as which of the following would most likely give you an STD…try that one on for size :p
    .-= christina´s last blog ..Just the fingers now…. =-.

  17. auntie says:

    i just can’t answer because i’m psychologically scarred from just THINKING about these options! GAH!
    .-= auntie´s last blog ..Why is coming up with a title always the hardest part? =-.

  18. Sheri says:

    isn’t Wapner dead???
    Just sayin….
    .-= Sheri´s last blog ..Oops He did it again =-.

  19. Wendy says:

    All my fantasies involve Tom Colicchio. I <3 Tom!

  20. regan says:

    1. Wapner because his name kinda sounds like a euphemism for sex. (imagine a frat boy voice): “Hell yeah I Wapnered her last night” oh! Gap should make that their next project red shirt Wapne(red)
    2. Judy
    3. Sandy Day
    4. Mathis
    5. Marshall but the Marshall from 1936 when he was young and not so Star Wars character-looking
    6. Colicchio without a doubt. He is sexy, can cook, and is sexy. Also, he’s sexy.
    .-= regan´s last blog ..derailed =-.

  21. Oh my god, I’m so glad to see this return! And I was going to participate until I scrolled through all of my options. And I just can’t do it! These are the worst ever! (Though Tom was an easy choice) 🙂
    .-= La Petite Chic´s last blog ..On the Negative and Positive =-.

  22. lceel says:

    Death is not an option – well I’m sorry, but GAY is not an option either. Although Judge Wapner was always sorta good looking.
    .-= lceel´s last blog ..Yes, ma’am … you wanna go WHERE ma’am? =-.

  23. tracey says:

    Dude, I would not be upset to do Simon Cowell. Though I fear he would be cruel in his comments during the act… perhaps I could bring duct tape? And a blindfold…
    .-= tracey´s last blog ..A very long post with way too many pictures and links… =-.

  24. 1. Wapner.
    Brown’s mustache is a little too ‘child molester’ for me.
    2. Judy.
    Ginsberg looks like she’s leave spittle in my hair.
    3. Sotomayor
    I felt guilty that my last 2 choices were white. I need some diversity in my pants.
    4. Mills Lane
    Not only do I have a think for short guys (Jeremy Piven, Kevin Connelly); but he was a boxing referee so I think he’d be able to yell cool things at me.
    5. Marshall.
    Because anyone that references pubic hair in a pick-up line deserves to go without sex.
    6. Colicchio
    (mmmmm, colicchio)
    .-= thecoconutdiaries´s last blog ..A Tequila A Day Keeps the Paycheck Away =-.

  25. Schwerer says:

    1. Wapner – ick
    2. Judy
    3. Sotomayor
    4. Mills Lane
    5. Marshall
    6. Both please!

    I officially have to go take a shower, and not cuz I am all hot and bothered…. ewww!