Still A Renter…For Now

Posted By on March 31, 2009

I realized from many people asking me that I have not filled you in on the whole condo situation. Which, my bad. Because you probably all thought I closed last Thursday like I was supposed to, right? Well you would be wrong.

Today was my other closing date. But we learned on Monday that Tuesday wasn’t going to happen. So we pushed it to Thursday.

That’s not going to happen either. According to someone (my realtor or lawyer or homeless man on the street) it won’t happen this week. But it’s “for sure” going to happen next week! Kthxbai!

It’s been supposed to “for sure!” happen three times now.

I had my final walk-thru last Thursday. Everything was fine, the small issues we found in the inspection were fixed and the nail holes in the walls had been filled and painted over. It was going to be all mine! And soon! The developer’s realtor even said that everything was all set! My realtor said “we probably could have even closed tomorrow (last Friday)” if I wasn’t going to be out of town. Oh how wrong everyone involved with this is. So very wrong.

So Monday, according to my lawyer, who is AWESOME by the way and so worth the $500 he charges, there was some hang-up with the condo questionnaire. What is a condo questionnaire, you ask? I have no idea. Something about the property. I stopped myself from Googling it lest I find some horrible story about someone losing their loan over a condo questionnaire. My realtor, who I also love by the by, said it was a routine thing and since my lender had done like 90 percent of the loans in the building, there shouldn’t be an issue.

There is some issue. Something about other people in the building being delinquent on their monthly assessments. At least, that’s the story they are giving my lawyer. Something tells me that there is something bigger here, like A LOT of people delinquent, which would raise my monthly assessments, which would change the terms of the loan. Which is a TOTAL guess and hopefully makes me sound like I know what I’m talking about. Which I don’t. Because I don’t Google anything about condos anymore. I just ask Twitter.

So. There you have it. I’m actually quite calm, surprisingly. I’m bummed because I want to move in, but the longer it goes on, the closer I get to the end of my lease which means I won’t be paying a mortgage payment and rent for the same month. I wasn’t planning to move until mid to late April anyway, so it isn’t like I have boxes piling up, waiting to go. That would imply that I even have boxes and have even started packing. WHICH I HAVE NOT. That would be putting the cart before the horse, people.

They think the closing will take place next week. Except, not a good time for this girl (points to self). We have a sales meeting at work and I will not be able to take any time off Monday thru Thursday. So the earliest I can do it is Friday. And frankly, I’m not really convinced that it will happen by then anyway. I’m not actually convinced it will ever happen. See? I’m not panicking. I’m just GLOOM AND DOOM.

And really, at this point with all this screwing around and me having to take a vacation day then switch it and switch it again, if it gets done before next Friday, THEY CAN WAIT. I’ve been very accommodating with their fluctuations. I never wanted to close in March in the first place. The developer did. And I was being nice because I loved this place and what was a week or two, really? And I could be on vacation next week. Because I thought I was closing on MARCH 26. After all this, I’d love to make them fucking wait. (Which is all a big, fat lie. I’m clearly all talk because can we just get this done now, please? Thanks.)

So that’s where it all stands. It’s all the universe’s way of screwing with me because I haven’t done laundry in 2 1/2 weeks because I keep saying “oh, I can do it when I close. Since I’ll have the day off.” You win this time Universe. You win. Because I’m almost out of underwear.

About the author

Kristabella, who also answers to “Hey! Drunk Girl!”, is a reformed band geek with an amazing ability to drink most people under the table. You can read her inane ramblings here, where she talks about her exciting life as a spinster with two cats and a fascination for Bacon.


22 Responses to “Still A Renter…For Now”

  1. slynnro says:

    Dude, I’d be freaking out too. Which is why I am never going to buy a house. Also because I cannot afford furniture. Well, technically, I can. But I’m married to a home decor miser.

    slynnros last blog post..Stuff You Should Buy Right Now

  2. Good luck! I shed lots and lots and LOTS of tears over the clothing of the two houses we’ve bought in our lifetimes. I’m way over dramatic and all that jazz, but I am proud of you for being all, “whatever.”

    living with lindsays last blog post..A Vacuum Cleaner that Sucks

  3. Christina says:

    Oh how frustrating!!!! I hope that it works out, at least your lawyer and realtor have your best interest at heart!

    Christinas last blog post..I’m

  4. Gah. I’m thankful that you can remind me how frustrating buying a house/condo is because I have been jonesing for a yard something fierce this year.

    nancypearlwannabes last blog post..Testing… Testing…

  5. Sara says:

    Sorry. That sucks. At least you have someplace to live. We were in a hotel waiting to close when we were waiting for this house.

  6. Julie C says:

    Whata pain… Sorry this is getting dragged out. At least you have a good attitude about it (and will soon have clean underwear).

    Julie Cs last blog post..She’s 12 Weeks Old Already

  7. gorillabuns says:

    i personally think you should go and buy a month’s worth of disposable underwear at Target.

    gorillabunss last blog post..babes in toyland

  8. bikerchick says:

    ::there there:: Somewhere, over the rainbow, is a happy ending. If you dive into packing now, I promise you that this misery will eclipse the anxiety you are feeling. Kind of like slamming your elbow tdown o trick your body into not feeling other pain. I’ll totally come help you pack–seriously. I’m great at it; you just have to keep me hydrated!

  9. Lori says:

    since there isn’t much you can do on the closing end – and i believe that will all come together just fine – you can at least work on getting some clean undies! thinking good thougthts for you on this, the closing, i mean.

    Loris last blog post..obama at sun devil stadium

  10. you should move in with me 😉

    Michael Tragics last blog post..Closure: Finally letting go 10 years later|Pt: 4 of 5

  11. Scarlet says:

    I don’t really even know what it means “to close”.

    Scarlets last blog post..How Soon Is Now

  12. Darcey says:

    All I can tell you is to have faith in your realtor and attorney.

    And be thankful you don’t have suspicious water leaking through your vent onto your bathroom floor, which required an umbrella and pair of rain boots to use the toilet this morning. (Don’t think I didn’t seriously consider peeing in the bathtub…)

  13. Ira says:

    I hope you didn’t freak out after listening to the most recent This American Life about all the poorly built condos in Chicago and how the residents are being stuck paying the entire water bill, gas bill etc, cause then you’d really freak out.

  14. -R- says:

    If your realtor isn’t worried, I’m sure it will be fine. Plus, like you said, now you don’t have to pay for the mortgage and rent at the same time.

  15. Lisbethf says:

    I’m a condo owner and you DO NOT want to be in a community that has delinquent dues payers. Let them figure it out and make sure its the right move.

  16. slynnro says:

    I went on a tour of haunted places in Chicago this weekend AND YOUR CONDO WAS ONE OF THEM. YOU ARE SO FUCKING FUCKED.

    slynnros last blog post..Stuff You Should Buy Right Now

  17. metalia says:

    My tweet before? I WASN’T KIDDING AT ALL.

    (Except for that I was. Don’t worry, chica. All will be okay. Can’t wait to hear the good news, and hear that you’re moving in.!)

    metalias last blog post..The Bela Karolyi School of Crawling and a Very Special List

  18. regan says:

    I bet your future neighbors all run meth labs and child prostitution rings. The questionnaire was to figure out if you are okay with that and you probably came out right on the fence. What would help move things along is if you call your condo association and hint that you’re okay with illegal activities. You’ll be closing in no time!

  19. Ree says:

    Oh, yea. I’d be freaking out. If you need to drink next week, call me.

    Rees last blog post..March New Commenters and a Meme

  20. TUWABVB says:

    Good for you for making them wait – I’m totally proud of you for taking the bull by the horns. So many buyers let the title company or lender walk all over them – you rock!

    Seriously, my husband received the 5th extension to close on one property today. At this point he just laughed…but this is the good thing – the more time that the parties have invested in getting something closed, the less likely they are to let it fail. So you’ll be good to go and in a new home soon! I can’t wait to hear all about it!

    TUWABVBs last blog post..Faith is not a thing which one loses, we merely cease to shape our lives by it.

  21. Moose says:

    The universe ALWAYS wins. I hate that.

    Mooses last blog post..Blink, Blink

  22. jodifur says:

    I cannot even imagine how much all this uncertainty must suck. Hang in there!

    jodifurs last blog post..Yesterday I Got Stuck At The Doctors Office Because There Was A Duck On My Car