Posted By Kristabella on November 24, 2007
Get it? Because St. Louis is?the Gateway City. Isn’t it? Because the arch is the gateway to the west. Even though there is way more country west of the Mississippi than east of it. But the same philosophy applies to college athletics. Because God forbid a team west of the Mississippi were to be good. Because they’ll never get the votes. Because their games are on too late for old people like Lee Corso to stay up and watch. Because Lee Corso is an ass.
That’s all?I have. Seriously.
I got in last night about 5:30. I made good time. Ate cheese popcorn. Stained my fingers. Got a piece of a popcorn kernel stuck on my tonsil. No.?I did. And it was annoying. And I can only imagine what people on I-55 thought as the white Sentra flew down the expressway at 78 miles an hour with the crazy brunette driving with her finger in her throat. And she wasn’t even throwing up.
I left that to Rich. Because he started drinking at 1 and was trashed by the time I got there. And he must have added 10 more rum and cokes on top of that, so he doesn’t really remember anything past me getting there and LSU losing.
And then we tried talking football with the stupidest waitress. Who is convinced that Mizzou is number one now only because LSU lost. Keep in mind, the Mizzou/Kansas game hasn’t even taken place yet. And when we asked her about the Big 12 Championship game, she didn’t know and just said “we’re number one. LSU lost. See because, they were number one.”
And then my head exploded all over my French Dip sandwich. And I don’t like grey matter in my Au Jus.
So right now, I’m just recovering. I did finally change my clothes and showered. Rich is at the airport picking up the team. And I was put to work, checking on Mike Holmgren’s amenities in his phat suite. Complete with grand piano. And he gets a lot of booze. It’s good to be a head coach.
Maybe I should take a nap, seeing as the drinking is going to start in less than an hour.
What your glass of rum and coke looks like after you’ve had 12 and you’ve fallen off of your stool.